Los Angeles high school student Jake Davidson is a man with a dream. Well, technically he’s one of millions of men, ages 13 to 90, with a dream of wooing our favorite Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue cover model and celebrity sports fan Kate Upton. Unfortunately, I think many of us – at least those of us in the non-psycho category – have realized that unless we can throw a 101-mph fastball through 9 innings and 110 pitches, we don’t stand much of a chance when it comes to stealing Upton’s heart.
But not being a Cy Young-winning pitcher won’t stand in Jake’s way, because he is staying the course in his desire to embarrass himself in Upton’s presence, as he recently recorded and posted a video dedicated to the two-time SI cover model, asking her to be his date to his prom.
I’ll say for starters that an L.A. kid with a confident vibe is no rare breed, but this invitation certainly lacks the panache of, say, a couple U.S. Marines asking Justin Timberlake or Mila Kunis to be their dates to the Marine Corps. Ball. Then again, if JT and the wonderful Ms. Kunis were good sports and willing to go, then maybe Jake can be the envy of all of his peers and get Upton to agree to go with him as well. Hell, even Kim Kardashian took the time to attend the Marine Corps. Ball (and then leave when her date wasn’t looking) so anything is possible.
So should Kate say yes? Well, aside from the fact that Jake retweets Men’s Humor, Colin Cowherd, Fake ESPN, TJ Simers and Ashton Kutcher, he seems like a good enough, ambitious young bro, unafraid of the wrath he has invoked from YouTube commenters. Obviously, Kate won’t say yes, but even if she responds, it’s a resounding moral victory for Jake. And in that case, he should just call up that Russian girl in Vancouver who thinks she looks like Kate and invite her to go with him instead.
(H/T to Hypervocal)