
That was the announcement from @UMMaizeRage, the “official twitter of the University of Michigan Maize Rage, college basketball’s most passionate and attractive student section.” I don’t know why they picked jorts — the colloquial name for jean shorts — but they seemed pretty jazzed about it.
This, courtesy of Lost Letterman via Instagram, was the result:

I can’t believe we didn’t have a “JORTS” tag before this. Anyway, the jorts accomplished what they were worn to do, I guess, as that night’s Michigan game ended as a a 62–47 win over Nebraska.
The only person I can think of who has done more to popularize jorts in the 2010s than the UM Maize Rage is WWE’s John Cena, who has wrestled in them for like a decade. If jorts are suddenly a magic charm, maybe we should organize a “jort out” for this year’s WrestleMania. Do you get extra points if you jort in an outdoor venue in the middle of a New Jersey April?


Bonus pneumonia points
Rock vs Cena: II Jorts vs Jorts
If Cena wins the Rock has to wear jorts forever
If Rock wins Cena can never wear jorts again.
Everyone at Wrestlemania gets free jorts to set the jorts record.
I’d be down to Jort it out in East Rutherford that’s for sure. However, it probably wouldn’t have the desired effect as many central Jersey residents would just wonder why more people aren’t wearing them.
The word JORTS is beginning to lose all meaning!! Jorts jorts jorts.
Jortsety jorts jorts joooooorrrrttttsssssssss
JORTS ON JORTS ON JORTS ON JORTS
MY JORTS GOTTA JORTS SO I CALL ‘EM JORTS!
J IS FOR “JEAN SHORTS”!
O IS FOR “OH REALLY?”!
R IS FOR “REALLY!”
T IS FOR “THAT’S COO’!”
S IS FOR “SHYUH!”
WHAT’S THAT SPELL?
JORTS AND JORTS AND JORTS AND JORTS! SPAGHETTI, SPAGHETTI, SPAGHETTI!
J AS IN “JORTS RULE!”
O AS IN “OH MY GOSH, THESE JORTS LOOK AMAZING!”
R AS IN “ROCKING THESE JORTS WITH ALL I’VE GOT!”
T AS IN “TIME TO JORT UP!”
S AS IN “SUP EVERYBODY, COME CHECK OUT MY COOL JORTS!”
JORTS JORTS JORTS JORTS LOVELY JORTS WONDERFUL JORTS
The jortsiest jorts that ever jortsed. (good lord you have no idea how many times I had to check the spelling)
FROM JORTSLAND, WEIGHING 251 JORTS, JOOOOOOHRTS CENA
College kids are STILL quoting ‘Old School”?!?
if the temperature at metlife stadium is any higher than 45, I SHALL JORT!
.
Now that weve established that jorting will be a thing, can we establish a proper length?
pockets must extend past all cut-off jorts