So far, we've shared with you a golden treasury of cheesy late-80s/early-90s WWF promo photos and a two-part retrospective of WCW's worst possible 8x10s.
No look at pro graps in the 1990s would be complete without Extreme Championship Wrestling, the hyper-violent, cursing-on-VHS, #3 promotion in wrestling's last boom period. ECW had a lot that positives that still hold up -- under-the-radar international stars given a chance to shine, a constantly-replenishing roster that gave WWE and WCW most of its top young stars, Beulah McGillicutty's trashy glory -- but some of it, mostly Blue Meanie's jean shorts, deserves to be lost in time.
Please enjoy these EXTREME GLAMOURSHOTS~. They're even better if you realize that almost everyone in the gallery is somewhere on a show 15 years later, milking whatever they had going for them here.
I don't think I ever knew that in ECW, Head was called "The Head" instead of just "Head." This is now my second favorite ECW MTV reference, right behind their pay-per-view event ECW: DEAD AT 21.
I preferred his original name, "Guy You Knew In Middle School Who Smoked: The Wrestler."
I like to think this wasn't taken after a match, he just showed up to the arena covered in blood. "Oh, we're taking photos? *strikes wrestler pose*"
It's important to remember that ECW, as good as it was, was like 15% dick and balls jokes. Also, everyone looked like either a dick or some balls.
Chris Candido: Several Surgeries Needed
Roadkill is such a wonderful wrestler to discover. If you don't remember ECW or don't like wrestling, please be aware that once there was a big fat Amish guy who hated chickens and had "plucker" in his nickname because it sounded like "f**ker."
Oh, and his tag team partner once proposed to a girl by putting a condom on her finger.
This is easily the best photo in the gallery. If I find out you all don't like Tracy Smothers, somebody's gonna die.
Good old Francine. A woman whose name perfectly matches her face.
Extreme Official?™
Come on, you guys trademarked "Extreme Official?" and now you're gonna go and ruin it by adding more question marks?
Also, I love the ECW referee shirts. They're always changing. They're like Star Trek uniforms.
I'll let you try to figure out how this guy went from "shrugging referee" to JUDGE.
All the information you need to know about Jerry Lynn:
1. He looks like Nickelback
2. In 2013 he is still a better wrestler than anybody in this gallery was in 1998
All the information you need to know about Justin Credible:
1. He looks like a penis
2. In 2013 he is exactly the same terrible wrestler he was in 1998
Oh, and a third thing:
3. once had an Uncle Kracker entrance theme
This 8x10 should've come with a companion photo of Bloodsport's Ray Jackson walking in and making "ouch" faces because he's thinking about what would happen to his balls if he tried this.
WE KNOW WHO THAT IS, TAZZ
Sandman has his face tattooed on the inside of his arm and wears a shirt featuring him doing the same pose he does in photos. This promo might be in 4-D, I don't think my eyes are evolved enough to see it properly.
These days, Shane Douglas makes a living by trying to "sneak into" Raw crowds and get them to start "E-C-Dub" chants, never aware that the 8-year old in the John Cena shirt and his Mom have no idea who Shane Douglas is. Just buy a ticket and go as yourself, man. I'm a huge wrestling nerd, and if Shane Douglas passed me on the street I either wouldn't notice him, or would say "lol, was that Shane Douglas" to my friends and continue on with my life.
Photo included as a courtesy to Best And Worst Of TNA Impact Wrestling columnist Danielle Matheson, aka the world's biggest/most adorable Spike Dudley fan.
no, please
I was hoping she'd signed this, "KNOW WHERE I CAN GET ANY DRUGS, LOVE TAMMY."
This becomes great if you pretend they're punching Francine in the boobs.
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Never has Brandon done so much by saying so little. Maybe I’m a huge ECW nerd, but the commentary literally made me almost shart about 4 times. Not to worry, I’m going to the doctor to get it checked out, but still. Exceptional observation skills, BS.
Oh god. X-Factor flashbacks!
I know you hate X-Factor but you ain’t gotta look at me like that
I do have everything I ever wanted..
I actually thought Justin Credible was a decent wrestler when he was in ECW. Man, was I ever mistaken when he showed up in the WWE.
Was Albert the 3rd member of X factor?
^ Yep.
Francine looks like she’s being held hostage by Triple Threat.
And the Jerry Lynn commentary is so accurate, love it.
it’s only accurate because there are no Lance Storm pictures…
Or Dean Malenko pictures.
She looks like she’s about to be gang raped.
Re: Jeff Jones pic number two, I believe those are actually question marks. Unless I’m mistaken and the chant actually was “ECW? ECW?”
The Axl Rotten one had me giggling the hardest.
True Story: JT Smith became a Comcast employee in Richmond and used to rent me the boxes when I wanted to get a PPV. Really, really nice guy.
Drop the “the.” Just “Head.” It’s cleaner.
I’m impressed (The) Head signed the photo.
If Head did sign it, it sort of makes sense. I’m guessing “she” would have had to sign it with the pen in her mouth and well.. I’m guessing she’s very skilled with her mouth.
..I’m going to hell, see what you’ve done to me ECW?
I’d prefer it if (The) Head’s autograph involved dunking (The) Head into a bucket of ink then throwing (The) Head at the promo photos. . . .I guess what I’m trying to say is: I want to throw ink covered mannequin heads at stuff.
So, in 2013, is Jeff Jones still wondering if he is/was an Extreme Official?(??)
I imagine him just running around like a lunatic asking everyone he sees.
“AM I AN EXTREME OFFICIAL?(??) AM I!!!????”
Francine had the “DTF” look mastered before “DTF” was ever a thing.
The best part of the FBI was their flag with Tommy Rich’s head airbrushed on. For years, I tried to get one of those, but alas, the ECW shopzone (run out of Paul E.’s mom’s basement) never put them up for sale.
I do not understand Rob Van Dam. It’s like when someone explains to me how an airplane works. You can say the words, but I assume it’s just some weird sort of sorcery.
cue Phil Hartman impression: “Ladies and gentlemen of the Jury, I’m just a simple Bear on a Toboggan, but there’s one thing I do know. Rob Van Dam is a terrible terrible wrestler”
The 1&1/2 star splash. The Sleep Inn of splashes
I was attacked by a pack of wolves with airbrushed fur as a child, so that’s probably why I just don’t get RVD.
Anyone remember when the Blue Meanie lost a bunch of weight and kinda looked jacked? Man that was weird, like skinny Jonah Hill.
Didn’t he have a hot fiance too? Did he ever get married? Ah the mysteries of the meanie
It wasn’t a fiancee; it was a porn star.
@Genuine: He was engaged to Jasmine St. Clair, if I’m not mistaken
“Sandman has his face tattooed on the inside of his arm and wears a shirt featuring him doing the same pose he does in photos. This promo might be in 4-D, I don’t think my eyes are evolved enough to see it properly.”
And the shirt that he’s wearing portrays him wearing the same shirt. It’s wrinkling my brain!
and the shirt is made to look like the beer he’s holding
BRRRRRRRAAAAAWWWWRWRRRMRMRMMRMRMMMMM!!!
Please keep away from patients that have had a stroke.
Even now, after more than 15 years, I’m still totally puzzled as to why the tattoo of his face on the inside of his arm looks like somebody just shot him in the head.
Just got that “Little Spike Dudley” was an acrostic for LSD.
his finish was the “Acid Drop,” what’d you think they were going for
SPIKEY!
Oh man, these are so great, except now i will forever be sad everytime I look at Jeff Jones? Apparently when Mike Awesome died, he had gotten a phonecall from someone at WWECW, and refused to believe it so he called and left Awesome a voicemail. After he left the voicemail he got phonecalls from other people telling him it was true. I just….Jeff Jones, why couldn’t you let me think that a failed C-list boy band member had fast-tracked through the legal ranks to become judge instead of making me think about death and feel sad and stuff? Goddamnit.
Chris Candido was dangerously close to Fabio territory
“He looks like a penis” – Now I know why Aldo Montoya had a jockstrap on his face
Francine’s name most definitely suited her face.
Even though there wasn’t much tread on her tires and she was a full blown drug addict, damn, Sunny still looks pretty good, which is really, really impressive. Somehow, Shawn Michaels is to blame for this.
Rotten used to show up on Kevin Eck’s (who now works for the WWE) video’s in his Baltimore Sun wrestling blog. He had some good impressions I thought. Never caught ECW in its hey day, always wished I did.
Is Spike’s photo signed in kanji?
I always forget that ECW had some seriously hot women… and then I remember that they had Jazz.
The judicial robes ended up being most flattering for young Jeff Jones.
Man, I didn’t remember just how butterface Francine was. Yikes!
Jerry Lynn – Carrying Rob Van Dam to halfway decent matches since 1997.
I once heard Justin credible works or used to work in an olive garden in Springfield, MA.
Haha. Justin Credible really was awful, wasn’t he? Still, he’s probably one of the easiest past wrestlers to remember who wasn’t a big name or did anything profound or provocative. And no, I don’t want to deal with the X-Factor.
Re: Justin Credible– I was always bothered by the fact that if you called him by just his last name he was simply “Credible.” Then I realized Paul E. was simply using truth on advertising.
Re: Tracy Smothers– My favorite ECW (possibly any wrestling related) memory is when I was forcibly shoved aside by Tracey Smothers at an ECW show in Springfield, TN so he could hit Cory Williams with some nachos. He’s the best.
The Triple Threat photo gets even stranger if you imagine Bam Bam Bigelow is voicing his approval with doulbe “OK” hand symbols like some sort of domestic violence affirming Pizza Box Cover.
Wait
I’m confused by the comments above I thought the general consensus for rvd was that he was a decent wrestler with flashy high flying spots not that he was a shit wrestler
from ECW to WWE I see Head traveled well
FBI was awesome. Who had more members through their history: them or the Dudleys?