This won't end badly for them at all!
This week on the WWE Raw open discussion thread:
It was a monumental year in WWE, including Raw’s record-breaking 1,000th episode and WWE Champion CM Punk’s historic reign. As 2013 looms, what will unfold on a special New Year’s Eve edition of Raw? Here are five things to look for on Monday at 8/7 CT on USA Network, including a special New Year’s Eve toast. (via WWE.com)
And, as always, here’s the With Leather five-point preview:
1. The last two shows fell on holidays, which left us with two taped shows in a row. Taped shows are almost always the worst, but I missed last week, and New Year’s Day doesn’t give me as much of an excuse to bail as Christmas, so here we are.
2. I haven’t read the spoilers in total (besides the one WWE.com decided to ruin for everyone), but from what I know, you will not enjoy the first and last 15 minutes of Raw. You’ll enjoy it even less if you’re one of those types who reads my column and gets bent out of shape when I start complaining about them treating women like garbage.
3. Regarding that WWE.com spoiler, that WWE.com spoiler sounds pretty great!
4. When you’re watching the show live and hear the crowd go AAAOOHHHH every time Miz knocks somebody down, remember: that is their real reaction, and nothing has been touched in post. The crowd is SUPER INTO every time Miz knocks somebody down!
5. Important Community News #1: We’re starting to get around 4,000 comments for these Raw threads, but they’re coming (more often than not) from the same 200ish people. If you’re a regular in these threads, please, make my holiday wishes come true by inviting one or more of your friends into tonight’s thread to ALSO make jokes with us, because I can only give so many top 10 comments to Lester and Tobogganing Bear before I give up and just copy/paste-in their jokes as my report.
Important Community News #2:
As a special incentive for participating in tonight’s December 31st pre-taped AAOOOHH bonanza, we’re allowing you to show your holiday spirit with the NEW YEAR’S EVE badge. All you have to do to unlock it is click the “like” button, tweet the WWE Raw open discussion thread on your Twittah Machine and drop a comment or several during tonight’s show. Suggestion: When you do these things, make sure you wait a sec and let the CONGRATULATIONS YOU UNLOCKED THIS BADGE thing to pop up at the bottom instead of quickly clicking away, because that’s why some of you aren’t getting them!
And as always, tonight’s 10 best comments will be featured in tomorrow’s pre-taped Best And Worst Of Raw column. To nominate a comment for top 10 consideration, please reply to it with a +1. I’m looking for 10 fresh faces this week, so let’s make that happen!
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Also, WWE needs to get Lester to do their Photoshops from now on. Make it so, Universe.
Sorry I missed everyone and a Mrs. ALo badge.
I hope Cena’s NY Resolution is to remember that the RESPECT part of his shtick should also include respect towards women, even in kayfabe. And I bet your ex wore white too. Don’t even get me started on the stupid white dress wedding tradition, since it’s only a construction of the Victorian era. Sorry, that whole segment still annoys me today.
Cena is such a bro. Quit hatin’ and bein’ jealous of how tough and cool he is
Cena is the best technical wrestler in the company. You all is just haterrrrrzzz
“you all is” & “haterrrrzzz” made this comment !
Just finished watching. I love John Cena.
sarcasm ! sarcasm everywhere !!
Can I still get that gnarly eve badge?
I just started watching the show on DVR and it’s Miz TV with Cena. Immediately turned it off.
(Also, why do they have those black pleather couches if they aren’t going to sit on them?!?! Personal Pet Peeve.)
Cena gets by with pooing in a wrestling ring….again..
On the bright side, I’m sure WWE’s target demo of 10 year olds got a ton of laffs from that closing segment. Remember kids: use childlish insults on people you don’t like. If they’re female, insinuate they’ve had sex with dozens of people. And when in doubt, get them dirty somehow.
In WWE’s defense, they wanted to use green slime but Nickelodeon has it trademarked
And that somehow, as a woman, you shouldn’t have sex with anyone even if you’re in a relationship with them because then you are a slut if you break up with them and then move on to another relationship in which you have the sex.
Jern DID make poopies.
Vince: “People love Cody’s moustache. Let’s push him.”
*Cena eats Disaster Kick, dies for two seconds, gets up and delivers AA*
I made the right choice watching King of Trios instead.
At least I got to see Tito Goddamn Santana deliver the flying forearm. And it was glorious.
That was weird. It was like they showed me Wade Barrett winning the IC title and then they cut to Mae Young having a baby. I’m sure I was drugged…
ADR’s pep talk to Ricardo LOVE!!!
Talking like a girl on purpose but it was just that great.
go down and read the FEELINGS~ we all had during that WONDERFULL~ MOMENT!
Cesaro is the perfect embodiment of Euro douchery: track jackets, fist pumping, and wearing the belt like a messenger bag a couple weeks ago when he escaped up the ramp. I notice these things.
As another note: I have been pretty happily living in sin for the past few years, and if anybody challenges my white dress when I finally get married in may I will preform a wide range of finishers on them, because fuck that.
meanwhile my wife wore a “champagne” colored dress when she had every right to wear a white one
Fashion is the key, devildinosaur. Fashion.
I told her grandma thought she was a slut
):
You should wear a colored dress under the white one so that at the climactic
point of the ceremony you can turn heel by ripping off the white one toreveal your sinful nature and then beat down the priest with a folding chair.
Great… now I’m going to be hoping for that heel turn at every wedding I attend.
You’re getting married in May?
Congrats!
Are all of us invited to the wedding?
So yeah, my rant is just to tell you to wear whatever the heck you want and tell anyone who says anything to you to eff off. :D We got your back. As someone who doesn’t plan on wearing white, I’ve got a lot of info to back up anyone who wants to argue with me about it (I also live in sin… if I was a church-going type) ;)
Because I’m on a kick,: The myth of “virgins wear white” was a construct of Victorian sensibilities perpetuated by etiquette columns. It was only after Queen Victoria’s wedding to Price Albert (not the one we know and love) in 1840 that white became the norm. Before that, many colors (including :gasp: red) were popular for royalty and women in most countries, including America, were known to wear whatever their best dress was, often a more somber color because their best dress was also their Sunday church dress. Before Victoria, white was often chosen simply because it showed you could afford a dress that could become dirty so easily. AFFLUENCE!
HAPPY NEW YEAR WITH LEATHER COMMUNITY! DRINK RESPONSIBLY!
Vickie didn’t invite Dawff.
Hooray wrestling! Hooray overacting! This opening tag match is less-than or equal-to any one of Cena’s films.
Are you just starting to watch the show?
I’m in California.
Hello?! Damn why does everybody have to leave after the show! We could have kept this party going! Oh well guess Imma have to fine something else to do.
*find
I can’t speak for everyone but I really needed a shower to wash away all the broken dreams and Cena jokez.
“You know what Dolph, a real man can accept his shortcomings, congratulate the victor, learn from his mistakes and RELEASE THE GIANT POOP BARREL I INSTALLED EARLIER TODAY!”
+ 1 exasperated sigh
+1
VINTAGE CENA!
+1
To top off that literal shit-show, it looks like I’ve missed an excellent LSU-Clemson game.
This was my first night posting but you all made it such a worthwhile experience I plan on coming back every week. Good night and Happy New Year everyone!
YAY! See ya next week :)
WWE doesn’t seem to realize that antiheroes only work in some contexts. We cheered Austin in spite of what he did because Vince was so much worse. But when you take that sort of attitude against rather mundane villainy, you end up with ostensible good-guy assholes like Cena and Miz. Stop trying to do a PG attitude era and let your heroes be heroes.
Also, the antihero idea falls apart when every “good” guy is an antihero.
Have a Happy New Year everybody. Don’t worry. Cena’s music won’t hit when the ball at 6 seconds.
Guys, this isn’t really WWE related but I’ve been thinking about it all day. Wouldn’t the guy who played “Artie, the Strongest Man in the World” be one of the best wrestlers ever?
Toby Huss is the best everything ever
Goddamn that was a great show.
But no one could possible challenge him and things would get boring.
Not necessarily, he got defeated by a bowling ball once.
He is the face that WWE has been looking for
ALL OF THE BESTS TO ANY PETE & PETE REFERENCE EVER MADE IN THIS COLUMN/THREAD.
After tonight AJ should just turn into Vaas from Far Cry 3. That would be awesome
Can we just have Vaas on RAW?
That works too :)
Fitting, because the end of Far Cry 3 and the end of Raw both leave me feeling like I wasted my time.
Well, that ended terribly but wasn’t all bad. Thanks everyone for making it all that more tolerable and confirming all of my righteous anger!
Happy new years!
For the “Boy meets world” crowd.
[youtu.be]
Tensai will get the biggest pop at the Royal Rumble.
My first badge was this New Year’s Eve badge. Now it’s covered in shit memories. Literally and figuratively.
Mine too
Well hope you have a happy new year. You can if you try to forget the last 3 hours…
What a load of shit.
literally
Indeed.
I like the change Barrett made to his elbow….
better than holding someone up by his nose before turning him around
I could have just repeatedly hit my head with a hard object and accomplished the same thing
Also Evan Bourne said on Twitter he won’t be in the Royal Rumble. So take not of that.
smokin that pineapple express?
Why does Cena feel the need to announce he’s in the royal rumble? Does he think we just figured he’d jack off to the rock when he comes back for the rumble?
Who says he can’t do both?
Is it over yet?
Oh look at that, there is actually something worse than the Raw we just watched….Couples Retreat.
At least Couples Retreat has Bowie.
I actually would’ve enjoyed Couple’s Retreat if it ended with all the characters getting covered in shit.
And Kristen Bell!
Couples Retreat with the sound off is more enjoyable than Raw with the sound off
I will agree with you on that Lester and DD, with the sound off and Kristen Bell, Couples Retreat isn’t as bad.
Good i didn’t want to be in a good mood for the New Year anyway. It’s better luck if I start off 2013 really indignant, right?
Nowhere To go but up! Thanks, WWE
To really piss Cena off, AJ and Dolph should have just no-selled the shit-dump and started making out.
+ 1
+gross and satisfying at the same time
+YES
Big news everyone. Primo is going to be in the Royal Rumble.
This is our year….
I’m actually looking forward to the Rock’s stale act next week. See what you’ve done to me WWE?
2013′s gonna be tough to get through isn’t it?….
Can I turn in my New Year’s Eve badge. I don’t want to be reminded of this episode.
Drive to Austin and throw it at Brandon’s doorstep.
I’ll take it. Better this badge than no badge at all.
Only if you turn in your gun too.
Also, dibs on your badge.
Brandon, please give Alex* my Eve badge. If anyone deserves to have two Eve badges, its Alex*.
I want another Eve badge ! pretty pleeeeease :(
Seriously, I watched the whole thing with the sound off and I still hate John Cena.
The doctor told me I couldn’t get pudding in that eye!
I think Dolph Ziggler holds the record now for most time’s a professional wreslter has been covered in fake shit.
+1000000000 !
if this doesn’t make the top 10 comments I don’t know what will !
We had the $240, we had to have the pudding. AWWWWW YEEAAAA
I’m old enough to get that… +1,000
+the state
But barry and Lamar, where did you get $240?
[youtu.be]
+I’m wanna dip my balls in it
Also, Italian Thanksgiving sketch is seriously my family at holidays.
You just took 10 minutes of my life, and I want them back
I’m interested in the logistics Cena went through to get that much shit into the arena.
It’s the sum of all those poopy faces he’s made throughout the year.
It was DX amount of goofy blueprints and outfits I’m sure.
I saw 5 minutes of that and it makes me question every choice I’ve ever made in my life.
HOW DARE YOU CENA! AJ HATES CHOCOLATE PUDDING!