Best:

Wanted to say thank you to Brandon for letting me do this. I won’t be as funny as he is and we don’t share all the same opinions but I’m incredibly excited to be a part of this. My band and I look forward to the blog every week and while we don’t comment, we read an appreciate everything everyone says. If you’re unfamiliar with who I am (and chances are that you are because why wouldn’t you be), my name is Dan. I sing in a band called The Wonder Years. We’re currently on tour with Yellowcard in the US and will be watching Survivor Series outside of the Boston House of Blues. I’ll be writing the report on a 12 hour overnight drive from Boston to Cleveland so it might be a little sleepy but I think it all makes sense. You can check us out here if you want: www.thewonderyearsband.com

Survivor Series

Best:

Unexpected matches with good, underused talent. I feel like they realized the card wasn’t quite full and just threw this on but I’ll take it. I think Tyson Kidd is f**king awesome. I don’t know why he yells “Yep!” when he does anything like that guy from Storage Wars (I assume its an homage) but the guy can wrestle. I’ve actually always liked Tensai to a degree too. I feel like all they had to do was give him the mic for ten minutes, let him say, “Yea, I was Albert. Then I went to Japan, reinvented myself, learned a new style and now I’m here to rip you all to pieces with my mountain dew mist and rib-breaking sentons.” Instead, they have Cole allude to it awkwardly and Tensai never gets any traction. I’m sure he’s making great money though if they paid him enough to leave Japan for it so I guess whatever.

Worst:

Rosa Mendez not leaving with Del Rio tonight. I like the idea of them together a lot. I really just want to start seeing payoffs to stories on the thing I’m paying $50 to see. Stop always saving it for Raw. People are going to stop giving you the money if they get the payoff the next day. Do it on the pay per view and then do one of those weird photo montages on Raw for the people that didn’t order. (Note: They really showed me later on in the show. Damn.)

Best:

Sin Cara doing something without his leg exploding. Last year at Survivor Series was such a bummer. The match itself wasn’t great and Sin Cara destroyed himself doing a pretty basic flip over the top rope. He looked way better this year. It doesn’t seem like he’s ever going to be the star they wanted him to be but he’s been improving and I’m interested in it.

Worst: F**k.

Brodus Clay Tensai suplex botch

That Brodus Clay/Tensai suplex “botch” or whatever was really sad. I feel like in a match where everything else looked pretty good, that was just upsetting. I thought Clay’s character had some chance to break out and grow when he started getting mad at Big Show this summer but then he just got dominated and now he’s stale and unexciting. I liked the idea of him as a dancing laughing guy until he gets mad and becomes an unstoppable machine. Instead, he’s more like a dancing laughing guy that gets mad and then is easily stopped by hitting him once or twice. What’s the point? Nevermind. The point is that kids get to dance in the ring. I actually appreciate that. Someone’s gotta dance with the kids.

Best:

Tyson Kidd doing the sharpshooter (about a million times better than the Rock) and everything that comes with it. Kidd needs a push.

Worst:

The seated senton that Rey does which I think is supposed to look cool and get everyone to say “ohh” and “ahh” but really just looks like a jumping dick to the face.

kaitlyn_eve_survivor_series

Best:

Kaitlyn is in jeans (kind of), which I think makes this a Chicago Street Fight.

Best:

Eve is pretty awesome. She’s improved a lot in the ring and she actually has a character with some depth and shades of gray. It’s cool to see. Her kicks looked legit, the triangle choke was awesome and she looked mean as shit when she was attacking and then smiley and disingenuous when pandering to the crowd. Kaitlyn isn’t bad either. It was the best Divas match I’ve seen in a long time. The only thing I really don’t like is Eve’s weak-looking finisher. She clearly has an arsenal of great looking MMA-holds. Why not let her tap her opponents out? You don’t get that a lot out of the Divas. Also, I hate myself more every time I type “Divas.”