Of course I had to go and jinx Stanford yesterday. Let me offer my sincerest apologies to the Cardinal fans out there for me rubbing my awful loser stench all over their football team that couldn’t even beat the stupid Washington Huskies. I owe you, so instead of relevant images, I’ve included special GIFs. But they’re only for Stanford people, because they have so little and go on to lead such meaningless lives.
Tonight
NCAA Football: Hawaii at BYU – 8 PM ET on ESPN
Would it kill the NCAA to schedule some good games on Friday nights? Like what about Baylor at West Virginia or FSU at USF in the Dsylexic Bowl? And why don’t USF and FSU play that game at Tropicana Field so we can call it the Palindrome in the Dome? Questions.
Saturday
NCAA Football: Missouri at UCF – Noon ET on FOX Sports Network
I’m a UCF fan and I’m from Missouri, so naturally my friends think this is like the huge battle of my two favorite teams. “Which side will he choose?” Who cares, just make sure I have cold beers and a basket of chips.
NCAA Football: Ohio State at Michigan State – 3:30 PM ET on ABC
I love Le’Veon Bell. Shit, sorry Spartans fans.
Sunday
NFL: New England at Buffalo – 1 PM ET on CBS
What the hell is going on with this incredible new trend of players coming back from injuries faster than anyone expected? First, Adrian Peterson completely assplodes his knee and now he’s “rust-free”, and now Aaron Hernandez is already out of his boot and doing cartwheels like all guys do (SEE, DAD?!?!). I think there’s a serious 6th Day vibe happening here.
NFL: Miami at Arizona – 4:05 PM ET on CBS
Not because anyone cares about this game, but it’s really interesting to see if Arizona is for real or not.
NFL: NY Giants at Philadelphia – 8:20 PM ET on NBC
Hakeem Nicks is currently doubtful, so Domenik Hixon will replace him if Nicks can’t play. What the crap, Giants? I’m Team Barden.
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I am dying to see wtf is going o with Nebraska’s shoes tomorrow. Adidas posted a teaser video where the players took pictures with an Iphone of their shoes and something weird happened. They said ‘tune in to find out what it is’, or something to that effect. All I want is their feet to look like they’re on fire like NBA Jam, all game long.
With the Double Dare, Simpson and the jiggly boobs GIFS, I was seriously unable to concentrate on anything you wrote. Were there any words in this post? I feel like there were words.
Great Cesar’s Ghost! With Leather’s watch this is getting better by the day. That woman under the buffalo/pats game is incredible.
I wonder if Miami’s shitty playcalling will bite them in the ass in the second half again, or will they just go full screw-up and mail it in at the start of the game? I think the game will be over by the end of the first half.
Also, for those in Canadia, Edmonton takes on their arch rivals from Calgary. The winner takes second and keeps pace with the BC Lions. Meanwhile the BC Lions look to get a big Dubbya in Regina and distance themselves from the rest of the West when the play the Roughriders tomorrow.
Burnsy should only be allowed to write in GIFS (that’s meant to be a compliment)
I’ve been watching the Ryder Cup today. After the Olympics I need my dose of yelling “USA! USA! USA!”
Just come back to check…nope, still not tired of the double dare gif.