"Siri, remind me to watch the MAHGFAQQINN LYMPICS."
One of the strangest and most precious gems from this weekend was discovering that Pulp Fiction slash The Avengers slash Star Wars slash everything else star Samuel L. Jackson loves the 2012 Summer Olympics and can't stop tweeting about them.
It's important to stress that this is not a parody, and that these are real tweets from @SamuelLJackson. They cover everything from handball to sync diving to Malaysian badminton, all with Jackson's contractually obligated tendency to shoehorn curse words into anything he's saying. The guy works in "f**k" like Jackson Pollock worked in drip. He spells it however he wants, puts it wherever he wants whether it makes sense or not and sometimes ends up with a mangle of consonants because he's SAMUEL L. MARGHFAGGUIN JACKSON.
Normally I'd want to provide some kind of commentary or context for these, but that'd be like touching a baby bird. Two major warnings before you proceed:
1. These tweets may contain harsh language, and reader discretion is advised.
2. These tweets may contain language you did not know existed.
Please enjoy 20 of the best Sam Jackson tweets from this weekend, and join us every day between now and the end of the Olympics for 20 more.
![[avatar]](http://p.uproxxcdn.com/photo/1245/thumb)
![[image]](http://cdn.wl.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/06/dwight-howard-is-still-pursuing-his-acting-career-just-watch-how-amazing-he-is-with-leather-180x180.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.wl.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/06/Horse-Fence-180x180.gif)
![[image]](http://cdn.wl.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/06/tumblr_inline_mo9e9ftR7U1qz4rgp-180x180.png)
![[image]](http://cdn.wl.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/06/lets-watch-mike-tyson-perform-at-the-tony-awards-for-some-reason-with-leather-180x180.jpg)
This is by a wide margin the best thing I’ve seen on the internet in a LONG time.
Twitter is a dream come true for loud assholes.
I’m not saying Sam is an asshole but it was by reading his tweets I came to that conclusion.
How does Bob Costas still have a job?
Samuel L for lead commentary!
“Lil’ babes, picking up heavy shit!” is my favourite.
I can’t decide whether I like that more or less than the idea of someone “dusting ass” at ping pong.
They should change “Female Weightlifting” to that.
Getting boned on the sync diving scores. How does Sam hear of these sports before I do?
I want Sam Jackson to rename all events. Forget air rifle/pistol, try to medal in 10 meter BB gun!
So it was Sam that was behind those spammer comments on uproxx about camaro’s and CREDITT HISTORY ISH.
I hate the olympics… and now, I have a venue to keep me updated on all these sports I dont give a damn about. Thanks Mace Windu
With tweets like that, I can’t believe Jackson’s never worked with director Antoine Fuqua.
Maybe if we tell him the last name is MARCHERFUQUA he’d jump at the chance.
This was so much fun reading in his voice, yelling.
And SLJ was totally right about the US women getting boned on syncro diving. That marcherfuqua called it right! Judges were terrible.
Siri, How many K’s in Molymphukken?
The tweets are idiotic.
Nope!
You sir, are a national treasure :)
Molympicphukken…my new bad word. That shit right there was molympicphukken badass!
I’m hearing Malaysia might be bringing badminton noise. That’s not an Olympic tweet. That’s a warning to his coke connection.