Get some, Pele.
Last we checked in on international pop superstar Shakira, she was dumping her no-good soccer star boyfriend, Gerard Piqué, because he allegedly couldn’t stop putting his balls in other girls’ nets. But it turns out that Shakira’s not only ridiculously talented and attractive, but she’s quite forgiving, too. At least that’s what I’m taking away from the fact that she attended last night’s FIFA Soccer Awards at the Kongresshaus in Zurich with Piqué. Oh, and she also hosted the ceremony, so that may explain why she was there, too.
Regardless, Shakira was on hand to present Argentina’s Lionel Messi with his third Ballon d'Or football award, and Japan’s Homare Sawa with the Player of the Year award, as her team shocked the world by winning the Women’s World Cup. I would have given the award to Alex Morgan, in case she’s reading this and wants me to brush her hair later tonight.
Other soccer players like Wayne Rooney also won awards, but I’m just going to pretend that the entire event looked like this…
(Images via Getty, GIF via heaven.)
I'm guessing this isn't the first time that these old millionaires have paid to have a hot blonde hang out with them.
I can't stop laughing at this picture of Shakira sassing FIFA President Joseph Sepp Blatter.
Also, Sepp Blatter sounds like a very serious and painful disease.
This guy wins the creepiest old dude award every year.
Piqué is clearly staring at another woman, and Shakira should leave him and run away with me to teach him a lesson. Side note, Shakira: I will not sign a pre-nup.
Homare Sawa accepts her award. She also needs to accept that I will forever call her Homare Stoudamire.
What is that, velvet?
I sense a little Eiffel Tower action coming.
Nice skinny tie.
See? Wayne Rooney won something.
And Sepp is being creepy again.
Why no, I did not photoshop myself into this photo and frame it to put on my desk.
Worst placed trophy ever.
I can't even imagine the misogyny coming out of Rooney's mouth right here, but I bet it was awesome.
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It’s a sin to cover up those legs with a dress that long.
/waits for someone to bitch about her haircut
Rooney’s award was comeback hairline of the year.
“Also, Sepp Blatter sounds like a very serious and painful disease”
He’s doing his best to kill soccer, that’s for sure.
Stupid Latin women, taking their men back after they cheated and know they will cheat again. How am I supposed to have my shot at her if she keeps going back to Pique? Why, she probably thinks I don’t even exist. :(
Shakira’s like 5’1” in heels, some of these dudes must be chort.