Wolverine has a skeletal system made of Adamantium and his body can regenerate after almost any injury. Spider-Man has superhuman strength, with the ability to shoot webbing from his wrists and leap from building to building. The Human Torch can burst into flames and fly faster than any jet plane on Earth, and the Invisible Woman, well, she can turn invisible.
Tim Tebow’s super power is the ability to go 6-for-16 through 3 quarters and somehow pull a win out of his ass once he summons his magical pet kicker to boot a few 55-yarders. This isn’t a joke, Tebow is getting his own comic book.
"Like the Marvel heroes who pull off last minute victories, Tim Tebow has fans around the world on the edge of their seats and believing that in our own lives when time is running out and all looks lost, we can dig deep inside and use our various strengths to triumph over insurmountable odds" says Bill Rosemann of Marvel.
(Via the 96. 1 KISS Morning Freak Show,
starring Jack Mehoff and the Dingleberry)
I’m not surprised. Like I pointed out in the Greatest Moments of 2011, people love arguing about Tebow, whether it’s his religious faith or his ass backwards sophomore success. Either of those arguments – and throw in every girl’s typical response of, “I’d take his virginity” – proves that he’s extremely marketable so this will obviously be a success.
After the jump (and above) I have a few of Marvel’s first sketches of “Tebow Time”, as well as a few sketches that I made that Marvel can feel free to use.
In this shot, Tebow is charging against the evil-yet-child-brained Miami Dolphins. He eventually foils them by creating the illusion that he won't run for the 2-point conversion while everyone in the stadium knows that he will.
Rogue as a sexy Broncos cheerleader or GTFO.
Here's my first offering - it's Tebow summoning his special powers.
In this one, he saved an innocent damsel from certain danger.
And I'm not sure what's happening here, but I'm sure it was spectacular.
![[avatar]](http://p.uproxxcdn.com/photo/1110/thumb)
![[image]](http://cdn.wl.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/05/Dolphins-Aircraft-Carrier-180x180.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.wl.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/05/alex-karras-george-plimpton-180x180.png)
![[image]](http://cdn.wl.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/05/JR-Smith-Louis-CK-180x180.gif)
![[image]](http://cdn.wl.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/04/Edelman-and-Cooper-with-Bauman-180x180.jpg)
I hope they write the backstory so that his father was the NFL Superpro.
[cache.io9.com]
Holy crap, son! Somebody’s got more time on their hands at work than I do. Where the hell did you track that down?
Hell, that took five seconds to Google.
[en.wikipedia.org]
Some things are so fucking awful you just can’t forget, no matter how much you try to drink away the memory. And the bastard child of the NFL and Marvel Comics is one of them.
Can we get a crossover with GI Joe Team member “The Fridge”?
I assume his arch nemesis will be Merril Hogegoblin?
I can’t believe this comment hasn’t gotten more love…I lollercoaster’d
But…but super-powers are a blasphemous affront to Him!
Can’t believe I almost forgot about his rack-nificent lady friend. You’re doing god’s work, Burnsy.
Also, this was not Tebow’s rookie season.
Yeah, my bad.
What will happen when TIM TEBOW has to go up against THE LEGION OF COMPETENT DEFENSIVE BACKS?!?! Will TIM TEBOW be able to beat MAN COVERAGE INSTEAD OF FUCKING RETARDED ZONE COVERAGE?!?! WHO THE FUCK PLAYS ZONE AGAINST A QUARTERBACK WHO CAN’T COMPLETE MORE THAN 50% OF HIS PASSES?!?! Find out next week!
Seriously though, fuck everything about this story. I want to fuck Tim Tebow’s ex-girlfriend in front of his eyes and then murder him. I might even call that girl the next day.
Well done my friend, well done.
The term “true believer” just took on a new meaning.
In pic #3; what do you suppose is in the fanny pack?
Don’t people like Tebow think comic books are a work of Satan? This thing will never sell, but then again no comic book sells these days.
And Marvel just lost a lot of my respect…………………..SELL OUTS……………………
I’ll always wonder if his gf in that pic is holding a warm washcloth…
“and throw in every girl’s typical response of, “I’d take his virginity”
Oh no, I wouldn’t just take his virginity. I’d take it and turn him into the world’s biggest douchebag via sex and pure debauchery. You think he’s insufferable now? Wait until I give him the taste of sex, drugs and rock & roll. I would revel in America hating me for turning human Mickey Mouse into a drunken sex addict.