"WOOOOOO! I'M 64 YEARS OLD!"

26) Baltimore Ravens (3-1) – As of this point in the season, I think the Ravens are a much better team than the Steelers. The good thing is that the Steelers feed off of absurd statements like that from people a lot more relevant than me and they use it to their advantage. I just hope that this holds true and these two teams give us more of their great rivalry as the season continues. And I hope that someone makes the Falcons and Packers watch this rivalry and yells, “See? This is what a good rivalry looks like!”

27) Buffalo Bills (4-1) – Do you trust them yet? I don’t. I’m still not ready to sign off on a Harvard lad and a 30-year old RB, but that doesn’t mean that they’re not actually good. What I find most entertaining about the Bills’ success is the “what about C.J. Spiller?” conversation in the media. They say there’s no place for him. Sure, it sucks that a young, explosive RB isn’t seeing much playing time. But is it a terrible thing that the Bills are keeping him fresh for a few seasons? I don’t know. Maybe ask Fred Jackson.

28) San Diego Chargers (4-1) – If the Chargers had blown their lead against the Broncos after Tebow came into the game Sunday, two things would have happened: 1) Broncos fans would have all converted to Christianity and stoned John Fox in the public square, and B) Chargers fans would have purchased stock in digital billboards.

29) New Orleans Saints (4-1) – With the Bucs being demolished by the 49ers, the Saints should have the NFC South locked up by… now.

30) New England Patriots (4-1) – Tom Brady is no longer on pace to throw 6,000 yards, which is just pathetic. Seriously, how does he even have a job right now? He’s not fit to hold Alex Smith’s clipboard.

31) Detroit Lions (5-0) – Every Sunday when I walk to my friend’s bar to watch the games, I pass this homeless guy who wears a Barry Sanders jersey for game day. I used to think that maybe I should throw him a buck or two just out of appreciation for his loyalty as a fan, not to mention his hardship in life. Then I remember that I’m a Dolphins fan.

32) Green Bay Packers (5-0) – Can we just get the trophy ready for these guys now? I’d say it’s quickly creeping up on death and taxes as a certainty.