The Mila Kunis

I think that by now, as we grow to understand the general male consensus on female attractiveness, the ladies I’ve chosen to represent each group should need little explanation. In this case, Mila Kunis is wonderful and can do no wrong, therefore these are your elite RBs, playing in their primes, at the top of their games, and worthy of every ounce of praise that we have. Well, sort of.
1) Arian Foster – Let me start off by saying that making Foster the top RB is very difficult for me. While his numbers from last season are insane and bordering on Priest Holmes, they came from nowhere and could just as easily disappear. But as long as Foster plays for a high-powered offense, behind a great offensive line, he should be a stud. Still, the top of the mountain is making me very happy that I’m picking 11 this year.
2) LeSean McCoy – You could say this is too early for a guy who has to share the ball with Mike Vick, but McCoy is my gut feeling guy. Granted, he was an absolute stud last year, so it’s not a difficult feeling to have, but look as far as ranking him No. 2? Look at his offense, and then look at Tennessee and Minnesota. The Philadelphia Eagles will be running a lot in garbage time this season, and McCoy is the reason I didn’t have Vick No. 1 for QBs.
3) Jamaal Charles – Say what you want about Thomas Jones and splitting carries, but the Kansas City Chiefs would have to be insane to not make Charles the focal point of their offense this season. It’s year 4, time to make him a superstar. If he’s not earning some nickname like Faulk 2.0 or the Pope (an homage to Holmes, obviously), I’ll be disappointed.
4) Chris Johnson – I don’t want to have him this high, because I wouldn’t draft Johnson with a Top 5 pick. He’s holding out for more money and he’s the only good part of Tennessee’s offense. He wasn’t great last season and he’s a guy who should always be great. I just think there’s a huge red flag on CJ this season.


well based on this, i’m taking Addai, Lynch and Wells.
Rice at #9… you lost me at charles at 3 though. Moron.
Yay, a troll!
Eh, I think Ray Rice is going to have a huge year.
McGahee is gone, Heap is gone, and Mason might go too, and that means a lot more opportunity for him in the red zone. They brought in Vonta Leach, who’ll block mostly, and Rice apparently showed up for camp looking like a roided-out Webster.
I hate the Pats, but you know Danny Woodhead is going to get some touches. Not a bad guy to have in PPR leagues.
I’m not saying I don’t hope Rice has a good year, I’m just saying that he’s not at the top of my list.
Also, Charles had almost 1,500 yards on 230 carries. Check out the other RBs that I put him ahead of.
4) Chris Johnson -He’s holding out for more money and he’s the only good part of Tennessee’s offense.
Hmmm…While Chris Johnson is the best part of the Titans offense, the OL is really, really good. It’s theorized by the talking heads that the OL is going to give Hasselbeck much better protection than he was getting in Seattle, and he will therefore by extrapolation be more productive. If the Titans get a really solid performance out of Hasselbeck, CJ is going to run wild. I think spot 3 or 4 on your list is perfect for CJ this year. He’s not going to hit 2K, but once his new deal gets signed (I’d hold out of training camp too…the temp hit 101 in Nashville today), I think he’ll be good for about 1,500.
As good a fantasy list as anyone else can produce. Each season there are so many surprises it’s pretty much a crap shoot.
@squabbler
I bet Hasselbeck gets back spasms in week 2 from just dropping back. Regardless, the offense was only CJ last year and he still produced even with the defense keyed on him. No doubt he is top 5.
/TN fan and resident
//fuck its hot outside
No Kate Upton?! What the deuce!
Offensive line is one thing, but no passing game is another. See: 2010 Tennessee Titans.
Also, I have to drop Charles from 3 now because the Chiefs signed LeRon McClain. Charles may get 1 touchdown this season.
We signed The Ron? Woohoo!
I think Beef Moe is THE sleeper pick this year. A year in the system under his belt, no QB talent, the line should be better in Happy Carroll’s second year. They will pretty much have to run a shit ton.
Knowshon at #30? Just curious on your reasoning, considering he finished last year like 17th in points (non-ppr) despite missing 3 games early, and then only playing a few snaps the last 3 games from a rib injury, and this will only be his 3rd year
I really couldn’t focus on running backs until Meg Ryan butchered face showed up.
Rumor has it that Ryan Mathews showed up WAY out of shape and
damnit; Tolbert was running first team, but it’s way early.
Woodhead is Scary-good..
I think Beef Moe is THE sleeper pick this year.
Could be, but I’m worried that team is going to be down three scores at halftime in every game and have to abandon the run.
Plus, I think every league has one guy who only remembers that run versus the Saints and reaches for him way too soon.
That said, if he’s there in the late third or fourth round, I’d grab him for sure. BEEF MOE.
unless Rashard has been hiding Osama for the past decade, I’d take him at 10-12 (if he’s there). He’ll be good for 1200+ yrds and most likely 12 TD’s. Either that, or he’ll pull a Billy Cole move during first rain game. ‘ain’t life a bitch?’
What I got from this is that you overrate Mila Kunis (seriously, she’s a communist dwarf, look it up) and underrate Alison Brie.
Oof on the LeSean being #2 anymore…
John don’t you dare talk about my Mila that way. She shits skittles and her menstrual cycle tastes of the sweeties strawberries.
It’s just that the skittles come out VERY fast, like bullets.
I with John. Nothing against Mila but Alison Brie is what dreams are made of. What I’m trying to say is that while I’m drafting Blount and Rice as my RBs I will be flapping to Annie in my mind now. My draft party could be awkward. (more so than usual, that is)
Flapping? That WOULD be awkward!