In case you missed it during that weird period when a video goes viral and the person who made it gets butthurt and takes it down, then realizes it is their only shot at ironic fame and puts it back up so they can get on Tosh, please enjoy this video of University of Alabama Panhellenic Association Board combining their awful white teen girl powers to form some Godless approximation of musical Voltron. In layman’s terms, white girls are stealing from every culture imaginable, be it Greek to African-American to Internet, and they feel totally amazing doing it. Vince Mancini and Josh Zerkle gave the track (cough) a listen on the latest Frotcast, and it is my job to sorta shuffle it over here. Every day I’m shuffling.
Highlights include a namedrop of football coach Nick Saban, a big “ta-da” finish inside Bryant–Denny Stadium and a Rebecca Black remix, because that’s something people still think is funny. Who am I kidding, the only highlight is that you’re watching this and not one of the people in it.
From the Daily Mail:
The school’s media relations director, Cathy Andreen, told The Huffington Post: ‘It was supposed to just be to welcome the girls who were going out for Greek rush.’
Ashley Getwan, president of the Panhellenic Association at the university, said: ‘We didn’t realize it would get so much publicity… Any publicity is good publicity, we hope.’
CBS42.com reported that the school’s rush week has seen a record number of would-be pledges, with more than 1,700 and counting.
Counterpoint:
One YouTube commenter wrote: ‘This is f**king embarrassing. I love this school, but this is why people can’t stand these sh*theads.’
I’m going to throw in with the second guy.
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I made it about 30 seconds into the song then quit. I wonder if those girls “go Greek?” And by going Greek, well you know what I mean.
1,700 Greek pledges…..that’s a lot of people to be anally penetrated this semester.
poonTASTIC knows what I’m talking about.
Word
But where are the words? It was them moving their lips, but no sound coming out?
1700?!? Holy shit. WE’RE GONNA NEED MORE PUFFY PAINT!
I have never been been more glad that I went to a school without fraternities or sororities.
They cant be sorostitutes, there’s no cum on their faces or herpes sores… that we can see.
Be honest: if these girls really piss you off, it’s not because they rip off the internet or steal from black people.
It’s because girls like this don’t sleep with internet dorks like you.
@RomanCandle – Sure they do! But no, seriously, they don’t piss me off, they’re just worthy of derision for their dumb video.
@Roman Candle
The sorority scene is great if that’s what works for you.
Sadly, there’s a reason that a lot of hipsters get laid.
Lots of non-sorority girls go to frat parties because…well, because there’s fuck-all to do other than that, seeing as how most chicks aren’t content to play Call of Duty, workout and fap and call it a weekend.
Ironically, quite a few chicks (some of them belonging to sororities, but usually not) tend to be disgusted and disenchanted by the aggressive, straightforward and low-brow approaches of intoxicated frat guys. “Hurr durr I’m drunk you’re hot let’s fuck” is a formula that works, but not often. Some guys can make it happen, but others of us can’t.
Cue the hipster GDI. Now look, most geeds (speaking as one, btw) couldn’t hold a conversation with an attractive girl in a party setting to save their lives – but a few can. There’s a delicate balance to be stricken, though – come off as too douchey (I just saw this postmodern redux of Lorca’s “Blood Wedding” and found delicious allusions within it to “Duchess of Malfi”) and the chick will dismiss you as the pretentious asshole that you are (speaking as one, by the way). Come off as too faux-fratty (I used to play lax, yeah lax, bro, lax, foobaw, Texas, foobaw, Amurrka) and you’ll seen your right hand put to good use that night.
The key is balance, as I stated earlier. Just like a fantasy auction draft, your best bet is to wait until later when everyone else has spent up their capital so you can capitalize on your opportunity without competition.
Course, I have a girlfriend so I can’t tomcat like some of you other pimps out there. Just sharing what I’ve found to work.