Watching Huntington Beach, California, little league pitcher Braydon Salzman get cranked in the face by a *PINK* sound effect and a line-drive is not funny. There’s no way you could expect him to react in time. Even a line-drive leaving the bat of a 40-pound little leaguer could severely injure or even kill you. If you watch the video, it starts off scary — you don’t know if the kid is going to come up with both of his eyeballs. He can’t make the play at first, but he eventually stands up under his own power and gets an ovation. That clears the way for something very special to happen: super slow motion replay.
Super slow motion replay can make almost anything funny (and beautiful, come to think of it), and you can’t help but laugh watching the ball crush this kid’s flat-ass brim and knock him to the ground. The announcers point out that he’s hurt and scared, but “more upset that it might’ve ruined the brim of his cap … he likes it so straight!” Something about the analytical tone of the call makes me laugh out loud.
As if this wasn’t funny enough, the next pitch the kid throws bounces in the dirt and ricochets into the umpire’s balls.
[h/t Failblog]
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For all of the pearl-clutching among the commentators about pitch count and “saving arms,” not one word has been said about how fucked-up it is that these 13yo boys — some of which are well over 5’8″ and 130 pounds — are playing on a field that is 46′/60′.
My son has played travel ball (insert Those Parents joke here) since was 8 years old. The last time he played on a 46/60 field was when he was 10. Some of those kids at the LLWS throw the equivalent of 90+ mph, and that ball’s coming back at you at 46 feet away? It’s a wonder a kid hasn’t been killed.
And don’t get me started on why 13yos can’t steal a base, either. When are they supposed to learn to do that, high school?
This is the greatest post ever. Take the rest of the day off. In fact, take a long weekend. Thank you.
ESPN has made me hate the LLWS. Especially when they were talking about it during last nights Red Sox-Rangers game.
When I was growing up, only retarded kids wore their cap brims the way kids wear their cap brims now.
@Vince – Totally. I edited out a story from this about how I used to get made fun of in school for not bending my brim enough, because nobody had ever shown me how to do it. In Virginia those things look like horseshoes. Now it’s just “place it gently on the back of your hair, just like you bought it at the store”.
Kids these days are weak. In my day, the batters hit from a tee and the pitchers stood a foot in front of it wearing a blindfold while their pets were held at knife point. Want me to be impressed? Catch that ball with your teeth.
Maybe if he curved the bill of his hat and didn’t have it over his ears like a douchebag he might have been better protected. Those hats and baggy uniforms are atrocious. And yes, Lisa, they should be playing on the larger fields.
When I was little I had a kid on my team bend his brim to an acute point, like so: ^
And that still annoys me less than these queefs with the straight brims.
@Lisa Agreed the dimensions are too small. They can steal all they want though, they just can’t lead off or ‘leave early’ … probably because the bases are 4 steps away o.O
I think you do have to keep in mind that the LL rules are the basically same throughout, meaning the rules when you play your first game at the local field are the same rules when you’re on ESPN at the LLWS. The rules/field size seem stupid at the LLWS level of play where every kid is an all-star and is good at the game. During regular local LL play, the same kids are split up on different teams made up mostly of kids who suck at baseball, have no interest in playing baseball, or are retarded.
@Garipeto – I understand that. It’s just that, to me, baseball skills need to be taught early and often, and for a kid who’s 13 to never have played a game where he can lead off is ridiculous. Nine and 10-year-olds? Sure, they need to play on that small of a field with no lead-off, for their own safety. But 12s and 13s? No way. How’s a catcher who’s one year or so away from high school supposed to learn to pick people off? (Don’t get me started on the no-passed-3rd-strike.)
Our town doesn’t play Little League, we play Cal Ripken, and they’re the same way, which is why we left.
Let that be a lesson to the kid: When you wear your hat like a complete douchebag, you deserve to get hit in the head.
Am I a dick for wondering why the kid on 1st didn’t keep running?
Ken; no, just pragmatic.
I’m a VERY disappointed there is no line drive to the balls, since that would be life changing and also make it on AFV.
@Vince – NOTHING has changed.