2000 – Yankees, blah blah blah. The Pirates failed to start fresh in the sort-of-new-millennium, finishing 5th in the NL Central with a 69-93 record. Over in San Fran, Bonds recovered from injury with almost superhuman results. Winning the MVP once again, Bonds hit a career-best 49 homeruns. He also stole just 11 bases, which marked a career low at that point. But he was also weighing over 220-pounds at this point, so he must have been dealing with recovery weight. Thankfully, the world of sports was able to continue on after the Y2K bug failed to destroy everything we loved.
2001 – The Yankees failed at winning a fourth-consecutive World Series thanks to a band of rapscallion no-gooders known as the Arizona Diamondbacks. The Pirates went a different direction and tied the Tampa Bay Devil Rays for the worst record in the league at 62-100, as they ignored the idea of starting fresh in the new millennium again. Bonds won the MVP award again, as he hit 73 homeruns, 3 more than McGwire’s record-setting season in 1998. Gee, he must have worked out a whole bunch. Nerds didn’t care, though, because they were busy watching Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings.
2002 – The Anaheim Angels and their Rally Monkey defeated Bonds’ Giants 4-3 in an incredibly exciting World Series, while Bonds’ old team, the Pirates, finished 17 games below .500. Bonds hit just a modest 46 homeruns that season, but he suddenly decided to hit .370, which was .034 higher than his previous highest BA. On the music scene, Canada’s favorite snaggle tooth, Avril Lavigne gave us the instant classics “Complicated” and “Sk8ter Boi”. GRRRRR SHE’S SO PUNK ROCK!
2003 – In just their 11th season as a franchise, the Marlins defeated the Yankees to win their second World Series, this time with an actual team that wasn’t put together with gigantic checks and contracts. The Pirates improved on their 2002 results, finishing just 12 games under .500. Bonds won another MVP award with 45 homeruns and a .341 average. He may have also been moonlighting as a NFL defensive end, but he also received some attention for his association with BALCO. CBS also debuted Two and a Half Men as a comedy, despite having zero jokes.
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How long before we call a code red on Yinzer smug?
1996, 1997 – 2000, and 2009 were my favorite years of this retrospective, but the Z. Cavarrici pants reference really brought me back to my senior year of college.
Great work, Burnsy.
Great stuff, Burnsy. It really put how old I am into perspective.
Heh, they had to beat the worst team in baseball to do it.
Just noticed a typo in my comment, make that 1998 – 2000.
And of course with Casey McGehee’s 3-run homerun, they’ll probably be tied for second by the time they play tonight.
Bonds broke McGwire’s record by 3, not 11.
Eh, I blog like Ryan Theriot plays shortstop so I’m allowed a few mistakes.
Noticeable Omission: 1994, Montreal Expos would have won the World Series, 2002: The Ultimate frat boy movie of this generation, Van Wilder was released and 2004, Harold and Kumar, the second best fratboy movie of all time was released.
It’s a shame the Marlins can’t go back to greatness like they once did twice in the past. It was great to see Yankees, Red Sox, Dodgers and other big market fans fume when the Marlins won the World Series
I grew up in Pittsburgh, and was in high school in the early 90′s. That game 7 against the Braves was one of the most heartbreaking things I’ve seen. Fucking Sid Bream.
Nice to see Stroud isn’t the only one who can shoehorn pro wrestling references in.
/wishes Kathryn Bigelow had a missing front tooth
In the film industry, Tom Hanks captured our hearts as Forrest Gump, while millions of angst-ridden teens cried as jocks asked them, “Hey, what was the last thing that went through Kurt Cobain’s mind?”
A bullet. Duh.
At least their marketing team did a respectable job keeping people coming to the stadium for the past 2 decades. If there are two things in this world yinzers love (beside having their pregnant wives smoke cigarettes and chipped ham) it’s Firework night and free Soul Asylum concerts.
‘hey remember Runaway Train? It was very popular the last time our team was relevant’