Anybody remember Chrono Trigger? Remember how the Millennial Fair had a robot cat named Gato, and if you beat him up he’d sing to you and give you 15 silver points? Well, RoboCup Japan Open 2011 is a lot like the Millennial Fair, but their robot cat sings and beats itself up, and I’m guessing he cost way more than 15 silver points to build.

What you’re witnessing is the first soccer playing robot, dressed up like a cat, because “Japan”. He can’t really walk, and sort of backs up like he’s drunk, so I’m not sure at what point his creators decided 1) he should be an upright-walking anthropomorphic cat, or 2) play soccer. Watch in anticlimactic amazement as the cat takes about a minute to get into position, then slowly nudges the ball, falls over, and decapitates itself. Just smashes its face right into the ground. It looks a lot like me trying to play soccer in high school. Or at least the Ally McBeal paranoid-schizophrenic day illusion version.

This story can take one of three paths: The creators can say “ah well, good try” and stop trying to build robots, they can improve on the imperfections and create a team of godless monsters to qualify for the World Cup, or they can stop trying to make it play soccer and make it cute, like Doraemon, and it will eventually play soccer on its own, like Doraemon.

[via Dirty Tackle]