If you weren’t taking inventory of your beef jerky and pornography for the rapture on Saturday, there’s a good chance that you tuned into the 136th annual Preakness Stakes to see Shackleford out-horse the rest of this year’s equine contenders. Shackleford notably surrendered the lead to Animal Kingdom at the Kentucky Derby earlier this year, and it appeared to be déjà vu all over again as Kingdom made a late run at the Preakness title. But Shackleford held Kingdom off to eliminate any hopes of a Triple Crown win this year, so now we can talk about what really matters – girls in bikinis.
Everyone knows that the real Preakness highlights take place at the infield party, and this year’s party was off the chain, hook and any other slang terms that the kids use these days. Not only could you check out the ladies of the 2011 Jagermeister International Bikini Contest, but you could also
stalk hang out with infield hostess and former WWE star Stacy Keibler, as well as enjoy music by Bruno Mars and Train. Did I say enjoy? Sorry, that was careless of me.
Am I racist if I think that all horses look alike?
Baltimore recognizes the Preakness with class.
Speaking of class...
Last year's Jager bikini champ, in case you'd already forgotten.
This is the best picture of Stacy from the Preakness. Pretty sure that's criminal.
He must have allergies.
Of course Stacy Keibler's face is covered.
If God opened the heavens today and told me that I could forever banish one band to Hell, it would take me 2 seconds to say Train. So consider yourselves lucky, Nickelback.
Sorry, just driving home my point.
Maybe one of the most underrated actors of the last decade. Viva Sports Night.
Billy Ripken should totally own a horse named "F*ck Face".
Seemingly harmless, Bruno Mars somehow pisses off every guy I know.
Boomer's 18-year old daughter Sydney likes to search her father's name on Facebook, a fun fact I found out when she sent me a Facebook message during the 2010 NFL season calling me ugly. I had updated my status to say that Boomer is an idiot, because he said there was no way the Minnesota Vikings were going to lose to the Miami Dolphins (they did) and he also said that UCF quarterback Rob Calabrese could be a great college QB a few days before he lost his job to a freshman. I thought it was cute that daddy's lil girl was sticking up for Boomer, but I'm actually quite handsome. The proper insult would have been calling me fat. I award no points.
"Hey, it's the guy from Buckcherry," shouted nobody.
And some general fan partying fun.
Wait for it...
Waaaait for it...
Waaaaaaaaait for it...
Pretty sure their horse didn't come in.