Golden-voiced panhandler Ted Williams is having a fire…sale. He’s planning to auction off his camouflage jacket and cardboard sign. Because where else could you get those?
The man with the golden voice wanted to put the sign on eBay to raise money for the “Ted Williams Second Chance Foundation.”
During his homeless days, Williams used the sign to panhandle and was holding it the day he was discovered by a reporter from The Columbus Dispatch.
I have a feeling that his “Second Chance Foundation” is a rubber coin purse in his sock where he keeps his booze money. You know what they say, after a second chance, and a third, and a fourth, you’ll surely find a fifth. Actually, I don’t know anyone that says that. It’s quite long and cumbersome to be a popular saying.
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he will use the funds for a fifth
here’s something shorter: “Fuck it. Let’s get shittay.”
My own personal irony would be if I bought the damn jacket and found out it was the one I donated to goodwill after I left the Army. Then I would have bought it twice.
Of course I think the buyer should cryogenically preserve the jacket and the sign, so when the real Ted Williams is reanimated, he can have a coat (because he’ll be chilly) and a sign (because it’s AWESOME!!!)
Isn’t this rummy on, like, his EIGHTH chance or something? I feel like he and Scott Hall should be the main event at WrestleMania XXRELAPSE.