yanks sox

As a fan of the St. Louis Cardinals, I’m generally acknowledged as one of the more intelligent, classy and handsome fans in baseball. With that said, I am absolutely appalled at the news of a New York Yankees fan stabbing a Boston Red Sox fan over the weekend. While eating at the Chowder Pot in New Haven, Connecticut, Yankees fan John Mayor and Red Sox fan Monte Freire exchanged words about their disapproval of each other’s baseball fanfare, resulting in Mayor stabbing Freire.

Mayor was busted while he was trying to hide the knife in some woods near the restaurant. Freire needed emergency surgery, but survived to curse Derek Jeter another day. The argument likely stemmed from the fact that the Red Sox, despite not making the playoffs, ruined the Yankees’ chances of winning the American League East. Instead, the Bronx Bombers finished a game behind the Tampa Bay Devil Rays. Initially it was believed that Freire was a Rays fan until detectives realized there are no Rays fans.

Video and retelling of this legendary rivalry stabbing after the jump.

After speaking with some witnesses and employees of the Chowder Pot, which I’m told has the most wicked clam chowder in all the world, I was able to put together this brief but graphic recount of the exchange between Mayor and Freire:

Freire: “FAHK YOU, YANKEES! A-FRAHD’S A PISSAH BUM!”
Mayor: “HEY! I’M EATIN’ CHOWDER OVER HERE!”
Freire: “HEY JAHN MAYAH, JESSICA SIMPSAHN CAHLLED, SHE WANTS HER PURSE BACK!”
Mayor: “I’M WARNIN’ YOU MAMALUKE, I AIN’T NO PUSSY SINGER!”
Freire: “JETAH’S A QUEEAH!”
Mayor: “I DID NOT DRIVE MY IROC ALL THE WAY TO CONNECTICUT FOR THIS IRRATIONAL BEHAVIOR!”
Freire: “STEINBRENNAH WAS A SAWKS FAN!”
*stabbing*

And scene. I know, right? It’s amazing that I was fired from my original job as head writer for Jay Leno.

 

Video and intimate details via NESN Boston.