Those grimy little hands that are desecrating the most hallowed trophy in sport belong to none other than the Terrorist of Twitter Trends, Justin Bieber.
The apple of Canada’s eye stopped by 30 Rock for a Today Show concert to warble out some of the tunes that have captivated the attention of every 13-year-old in the world including his interviewer Matt Lauer and brag about the Land Rover Usher bought him.
Tell ‘em what they want to know, MTV.com:
The singer sat down for a brief interview with co-host Matt Lauer before walking outside to a chorus of ecstatic screams and performing a 30 minute set. But perhaps the best encounter the singer had during his stint on the show was when he encountered the Stanley Cup, the NHL’s storied championship trophy. It was also visiting “Today” (accompanied by former Hartford Whalers star Brendan Shanahan and official “Keeper of the Cup” Mike Bolt), and Bieber got a little bit of face time with the most coveted prize in all of professional athletics. Bieber is a huge hockey fan and has played for most of his life.
Canadians may embrace the fact that one of their own kind has become a chart breaking pop music phenomena, but you can’t ignore this fact: No Canadian professional franchise of ANY MAJOR SPORT has won a championship since Bieber joined the world after exiting womb left. My theory? NO TEAM EVER WILL AGAIN AS LONG AS HE’S ALIVE. I’m not saying it’d be wise for Canada to knock off its newest national haircut, but it couldn’t hurt. Even Jesus agrees.
Need more evidence that Bieber needs to be vanquished? He stole his number one hit single Baby from AMERICAN-born Aziz Ansari. MY EXTREMELY POTENT BRAND OF JINGOISM WILL NOT STAND FOR THIS!
A Canadian with Bama bangs? Yep, let’s release Mark David Chapman from prison to take care of this little fag.
Why is there a small lesbian holding the Stanley Cup?
hartford whalers star? he was there for barely a year
“Canadians may embrace the fact that one of their own kind has become a chart breaking pop music phenomena.”
Actually, you’re dead wrong. Unlike the previous crap that we’ve brought to you, like, Celine, Nickelback, Barenaked Ladies and Avril Lavigne, we Canadians are not banging the drum that Bieber is Canadian.
It’s more like, “Did you know Justin Bieber is Canadian?” the person responds with a deep sigh and goes *Yup*. Then both immediately forget this shameful fact and pretend he’s American.
If Bieb played hockey his whole life, he’d know that you aren’t supposed to touch, let alone hold the Stanley Cup unless you win it.
@natch: Regardless of time spent, Shanny was still a star in Hartford. Still a stretch, none the less.
PS: The Vancouver WhiteCaps won the USL title twice in the last 5 years. Last year, they lost the title to Montreal. Last time I checked, soccer is the most popular sport in the world.
Team Canada, owned by the Franchise Hockey Canada (yes, it is a franchise) won gold in 2002 and 2010.
Just throwing those out there.
PPS: The teams that win the Stanley Cup usually have the most Canadians on their team. So it’s like a Canadian team anyway.