Someone’s Always Drunk In Philadelphia. And Sometimes That Someone Is 3 Years Old

I don’t see what the big deal is here. It’s not like this three-year-old getting bombed at a Phillies game is gonna get behind the wheel and drive home. The Sporting Blog reports that the kid might be only 3 years of age. At this pace, he’ll be killing a bottle of Jack before noon by the time he’s 10. But if he’s anything like Lenny Dykstra, he probably will. I’m a fan of the move. With Phillies fans drinking sooner, they’ll all become impotent by the time they’re 13. That’s great, since 13 is the typical age where they settle down and have children, you see. But yeah, that kid’s parents must be a real couple of boobs…