Scottie Pippen shows off his latest business acquisition.

Scottie Pippen shows off his latest business acquisition.

The famous American poet Christopher Wallace once wrote: “It’s like the more money we come across, the more problems we see.” If that is indeed the case, then Scottie Pippen has been problem free since 2002, as it was recently revealed in court that the Harpo to Michael Jordan’s Groucho has lost a huge deal of his career earnings in bad business decisions over the last eight years. In related news, I bought some Mac & Cheese last week and now it’s 2-for-1 at Publix.

Pippen was awarded a $2 million verdict on Monday, putting an end to a malpractice lawsuit the former Chicago Bull filed against the lawfirm of Pedersen & Houpt. Pippen was originally seeking $8.3 million as he alleged that the lawyers did a bad job of managing his purchase of a private jet in 2002, as well as other various investments. The jury’s decision was obviously considerably less than what Pippen was seeking, mainly because they think Pippen is full of doodie.

Tell me about these motorized icebergs, Chicago Sun-Times:


Pippen didn’t win the full $8.2 million he was seeking. Rather, the jury found he bore some responsibility in the bad business deals.

Pedersen & Houpt’s attorney in the case, Peter Sullivan, declined comment. But during opening statements, Sullivan argued that Pippen was looking for a scapegoat for a number of bad business decisions.

The private jet cost Pippen $4.3 million in 2002, and the plane was grounded within months of his purchase, leading to a number of costly repairs. According to Fanhouse, though, Pippen’s biggest problem is hardly a private jet. His estimated business losses over the past eight years are roughly $120 million. So when he left the courtroom in tears Monday, seemingly relieved that at least some justice was done, he was actually realizing that he just recovered 1/60th of the money he could have just as easily thrown into a wood chipper.

Pippen’s plight comes after news that 39-year old NFL veteran Mark Brunell is filing for bankruptcy. It’s truly a shame to watch these once prominent athletes having to deal with the public shame and humiliation that comes with having everything handed to them on a silver platter only to lose it all. What’s that? Why yes, yes I am making a dismissive wanking motion.