shaquille oneal si coverSomebody needs to explain to me why Shaquille O’Neal is on this week’s cover of Sports Illustrated. Is this the “Where Are They Now” issue? It should be. Are we sure this isn’t a picture of Moses Malone? Shaq looks like he’s 175 years old. And a half.

And what’s up with the…that line under the headline. What’s that called? “Will He Deliver A Ring To The King?” Seriously? Is O’Neal, who finished seventh on the Cavaliers in average minutes played, expected to carry the load for this team? Are his 10.6 ppg average in the playoffs the big difference-maker in this series against the Celtics? Is a guy whose off-season workout program consisted of creating stealing an idea for his own reality TV show deserving of his own SI cover? At age 38? Put me down for four “nays.”

I can’t wait until Shaq retires. He’s like the Andre Rison of the NBA. Of course, if Kelly Rowland burns his house down next week, I never said that. img via @JonahBallow.