LANDYCAKES

I laughed so hard that I pooped my pants when I realized that American soccer “star” Landon Donovan has to go all the way to Mexico just to do TV commercials. Here’s Landy’s ad for Ganagol, which looks like some 12-line parlay pick ‘em game that’s sure to be any sort of ripoff whatsoever. It’s in Mexico! How corrupt could it possibly be? I wonder whether Donovan was soaked with indigenous pee before or after the shoot. “Before” seems to make more sense. Help him get into character. –Guanabee.