Eugene Varshavsky of Lawrenceville, N.J. might be the first guy ever busted for cheating in a Sudoku tournament. Sudoku–that silly little game where incomplete rows and columns of numbers each have the same sum–held a tournament in Philadelphia last weekend,

Varshavsky, playing in a hooded sweatshirt, registered as a walk-on contestant Saturday morning, blazed through the second round in world-class time, but was unable to complete the easy first steps in the championship puzzle. Other competitors, including former winner (and Saturday’s second-place finisher) Thomas Snyder, saw that pattern as a red flag.

“The community of best solvers are very much friends and share solutions and strategies,” Snyder said. “Here was this new guy in a hoodie, acting mysterious and very, very confusing. Yet then, when he had to solve a problem on stage, under intense scrutiny, I saw he was in no way able to solve it.” –Philly Inquirer, via NJ Star-Ledger.

Seriously, what kind of asshole do you have to be to cheat in sudoku? Varshavsky wound up placing third and taking home a $3000 prize. Stealing from nerds is so high-school, man. I can’t imagine how that guy goes to sleep at night…or what he does on the train when he’s bored. Sudoku is easy, man… *pushes up glasses, prepares to be shunned by women everywhere*