The world is coming to an end. Up is down, vegans are eating bacon, and plastic bags are raising your children better than you ever could. And the Washington Nationals can’t stop winning baseball games.

Powered by back-to-back home runs from Ryan Zimmerman and Adam Dunn, the Nats hung on to win against the Florida Marlins last night, 5-4. It’s the fourth straight win for the Nats, and their eighth win in their last 12 games. Seriously, guys. This isn’t funny anymore. How am I supposed to get excited about a team that’s actually winning?

“I think, from the very beginning, their offensive weapons are up there with everybody in the league, with Josh Willingham, Dunn, Guzman and Zimmerman — and all those guys,” said Marlins manager Fredi Gonzalez. “They are a very dangerous offensive team, but I thought they made an improvement pitching-wise.” via.

I’ve said for some time that the middle of Washington’s lineup is as good as any in baseball, but it’s their horrible bullpen that puts them in so many close games, games that they now seem to be winning, and not just against scrubs; Florida’s in a freaking pennant race in the East, but they’re looking at getting swept this afternoon in DC. And you thought the Nats were swimming upstream, or maybe you weren’t because you just don’t care. Fine, then.

As for tonight: John Smoltz fans can get ready for another disappointing outing. The 42-year-old righthander faces Joba Chamberlain tonight in what will almost certainly have the Lubriderm and Kleenex flowing in ample supply in Bristol tonight. And I’ve about had it with Joba the Hutt anyway; sure, he’s having a good season, but would anybody be talking about this guy if he wasn’t playing for the Yankees?