06.16.09 STRAHAN TO MARRY EDDIE MURPHY’S EX-WIFE

Ain’t nuthin’ but a three-way, bay-bay. Three lowdown G’s gittin’ cray-zay…
FOX NFL analyst Michael Strahan announced his engagement to his girlfriend of over two years, Nicole Murphy. From People, the mecca of sports news for people that can’t pee standing up:

Murphy (the ex-wife of actor Eddie Murphy) on a beach in the Bahamas with a stunning canary yellow and white diamond ring.

“I have a great relationship and she’s a great girl,” says Strahan, who is a father of four. “I don’t like to talk much about my private life, but I’m really happy.”

Murphy, who has five children with her ex, wouldn’t comment about the plans for her future with Strahan. But he says that though they’ve talked about it, “There aren’t any plans for kids… We’ve got nine between us already.”

Last year, Murphy opened up about her romance with Strahan. “When I got divorced, I said never again,” she told PEOPLE in 2008. “[But] Michael and I talk about everything, and we both love to travel, explore and laugh.”

I hate laughing. I find it bothersome, so I’m grateful that Nicole finally found someone with whom she could share that annoying little habit. Laughing is a human response; it’s not a personality trait. You like Guns ‘N Roses? I LIKE GUNS ‘N ROSES! It’s amazing these people can even pretend to know what happiness is.