Noted Washington Redskins H-Back and burgeoning internet “personality” Chris Cooley was driving around in Wyoming last week(because this is what Chris Cooley does. He doesn’t knock up recently acquainted women or handle firearms or even play Madden all day. Nope. Dude is in a truck driving around one of those square states on the map). He then encountered one of the three possible things one could encounter in Wyoming: a dead cow. The other two things, for the record, are living cows and extreme boredom. From Cooley’s blog, via Shutdown Corner:
We were cruising around on our new land in Wyoming the other day and we found an old dead cow. So we decided that we would get rid of it by setting it on fire. Needless to say, it was a success.
I hope it was a success. How exactly does one screw up setting fire to a cow? Is there a class involved? I’m sure it’s a major at Ohio State, but what criteria does one use in rating bovine intervention. I guess this is why I’ll never play in the NFL. That and my flagrant alcoholism.