Here’s Carlos Zambrano’s epic meltdown in the Cubs game against the Pirates yesterday, and it’s true: you can’t spell “pirate” without “irate.” But what I don’t get is that Zambrano goes to the dugout, grabs a bat, and then starts assaulting the Gatorade machine in the dugout. First of all, that’s badass product placement. But really, what the hell did Gatorade ever do to you? It’s only provided refreshing electrolytes to its consumers since 1965.

No word on how long Zambrano or the drink dispenser will be out of action. But whatever; when you sign for $91 million, you can rip the ivy out of the centerfield wall and weave it into an evening gown if you want. Vegetation makes terrible padding anyway.

|via Hot Clicks|