Here’s your tennis post for May: Romania’s Simona Haley (pictured) is giving serious consideration about trimming down her two best friends (uh, also pictured) with breast reduction surgery. From Total Pro Sports (thanks, Drew):

Earlier this month in an interview with the Romanian site ProSport, Simona Halep stated her wishes to have breast reduction surgery. Upon explaining her reasoning behind such a decision, she pointed to the added weight and difficulty in carrying her jugs over to every ball that gets hit her way.

It’s worth pointing out here that Halep won’t turn 18 until September 27th, and that discussion of her breasts should be done behind closed doors and out of Chris Hansen’s phone wire-tapping network. But now Deadspin is reminding everyone that the interview could have been a mistranslation and ALL HOPE IS NOT LOST! Whatever. Looks like you clowns have a few months to brush up on your Romanian.