04.15.09 HULKAMANIA MIGHT RUN WILD ON EX-WIFE

There’s probably something scientific to be said for the psychological impact of divorce on the male psyche, considering the emotional anguish that comes from watching the dissolution of his own family, unable to do anything about it. But insinuating that you would go on a killing spree is probably the wrong way to express that.

Here’s what Hulk Hogan told Rolling Stone (via Page Six) about his impending divorce proceedings with his ex-wife, who probably has a name, but she wasn’t a pro wrestling superstar, so who cares:

“I could have turned everything into a crime scene, like OJ, cutting everybody’s throat,” he told the magazine. “You live half a mile from the 20,000-square-foot home you can’t go to anymore, you’re driving through downtown Clearwater and see a 19-year-old boy driving your Escalade, and you know that a 19-year-old boy is sleeping in your bed, with your wife . . . I totally understand OJ. I get it.”

It really depends on where you want to spend your money–divorce attorneys or criminal defense attorneys? Either way, it might not be a bad time to stock up on Italian shoes and gloves that don’t fit your hand when you fully extend your fingers.