One of the stunning non-chokes in early 2009 has to be Phil Mickenson’s victory at Doral over the weekend, as Lefty held off a weekend charge from Fres-yes State’s own Nick Watney. And as someone that appreciates the ridiculous, land-grabbingly traditions of golf, very little sends me into more of a punching fury than somebody like this prick. No, not Phil. The other guy:

“It’s a sporting event” doesn’t cut it for me, whether you consider golf to be an actual sport or not. That debate is pointless. I don’t know if Marissa Miller is a brunette or a blonde; she’s hot, and that’s all I care about. Just as golf is a game (can we agree on “game?”) enjoyed by many, it has its own social traditions and mores. One of which is, “Don’t be a tool.” Just as the guy that wears a Bulls jersey to a Cubs game deserves our scorn, so does this fellow that discourteously commanded Mr. Mickelson’s bar to a watery grave. Poppycock, I say.

|Devil Ball Golf|