Jags wide receiver and noted white athlete on drugs Matt Jones was arrested yesterday for violating terms of his drug treatment program. Jones tested positive for alcohol, violating the terms of the probation to which he agreed after being arrested for possession last July.
Terms of Jones’ drug treatment program call for participants to abstain from drugs and alcohol, and individuals are tested randomly for the substances. Positive results from Jones’ alcohol test came in late last week, and he appeared in court Monday to face Judge Mary Ann Gunn, who presides over the drug court, about the positive result.[...]
Jones’ entrance into the Washington County Drug Court stems from an incident last July in which Fayetteville police arrested the former first-round draft pick after seeing him inside a parked car allegedly cutting up cocaine with a Foot Locker discount card.
Jones had the choice of spending ten days in jail or six weeks in rehab. He chose jail, meaning that that Foot Locker card got him 75% time off. it’s a crafty move, really. It’s so much tougher to get laid in rehab.
|Florida Times-Union, via KSK|


Now that there is a Ninja in the White House all the good white athletes are gonna start spending time in the crossbar Hilton. The Man is keeping them down.
I wonder if judge Mary Ann Gunn has massive boobs…or possibly a penis?
It’s so much tougher to get laid in rehab.
Lindsay Lohan begs to differ.
I once used my Foot Locker discount card to check out of rehab.
Jones was also found guilty of wearing a tank top.
Here’s what pisses me off. Reports from the court say that Jones initially chose a six-week rehab program instead of 10 days in jail. Judge Gunn asked if he wanted some time to consider what that would do to his NFL career. He then changed his answer, agreeing to the jail term. Glad to see that our judicial system has its priorities straight!