Andrey Arshavin, the Russian star acquired by Arsenal in a £16M transfer — yes, the same guy who designs women’s clothes — has some awesomely progressive ideas about gender roles.

“If I had it in my power to introduce a ban on women driving cars and to withdraw all their licences, I would do it without thinking twice.” [...]

Yeah!  Where else do they need to go besides the grocery store, am I right?

If girls are interested, he also reeled off a list of pre-requisite requirements that he looks for in the opposite sex: “I like tall, slim girls with narrow thighs and tiny bums. If a girl is like this I do not pay attention to her breasts. Hair colour doesn’t matter either. What is really important is her style and manners.”

Wait, did I say style and manners?  Because I meant legs and ass.  I get those two confused all the time.  I’ll be like, “Hey baby, I wanna stick my face in your manners!”  and she’ll be all, “Uh, thank you?”