02.02.09 SUCK-OFF: SUPER BOWL REFLECTIONS
This looks awfully familiar
Because writing in coherent paragraphs is a tall order this morning, here are some thoughts on last night’s Super Bowl, gleaned while watching the game on my curvescreen in regular definition.
- Nice to see the Cardinals try to establish the run on their first possession. “Well, they’re gonna expect us to do what we’re good at, so let’s do something we suck at instead.”
- Until Larry Fitzgerald caught his first pass near the end of the first half, I figured Ken Whisenhunt was keeping his ringer on the bench so he could up the stakes of a bet with Tomlin at halftime.
- James Harrison’s pick-six has to be the biggest swing of momentum in Super Bowl history. I know I’m not breaking any new ground by making that statement, but Jesus. There were 8000 different ways that could have been less devastating for the Cardinals, and none of them happened.
- James Harrison: owner of the dirtiest and most egregious 1-yard penalty ever (not his fault — blame the steroids). He had a hell of a game otherwise, though.
- Cheering for Ben Roethlisberger to get sacked is one of the most frustrating things in all of sports.
- With the exception of the 1st quarter, Arizona’s defense played admirably all game, especially in the red zone. Except, you know, when it mattered most.
- As annoying as all the penalty flags were, there weren’t too many replays that I saw where I said, “Oh, that’s bullshit.” That last “fumble” by Warner needed to be reviewed, though. A Hail Mary — successful or not — would have been a much more satisfying end to the Super Bowl.
The season’s final Suck-Off award goes to… no one in particular. No jackass really sticks out at me. Maybe the Cards’ offensive coordinator in the first half? Or how about whoever does Budweiser’s ad campaigns? Those guys need their intestines pulled out with an eggbeater.
![[image]](http://cdn.wl.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2009/11/mike-tomlin-omar-epps-135x135.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.wl.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2009/11/eric_wood_draft-135x135.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.wl.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2009/11/canada-135x135.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.wl.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2009/11/favre_iraq_detainee-135x135.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.wl.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2009/11/ricky_williams-135x135.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.wl.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2009/11/roy_williams_fumble-135x135.jpg)
There are 15 comments about:
SUCK-OFF: SUPER BOWL REFLECTIONS
Maaaaaaaaake ouuuuuuuuuuuut. Wait, what?
Also learned last night: half a jar of bean dip CAN, indeed, give you noxious gas that keeps you awake half the night.
so can three bowls of my buddy’s chili, Matt.
I have more of a hangover from that shit this morning rather than anything else consumed last night.
Jesus teaches me that I should let YOU lead…
what is this “curvescreen” and “regular definition” that you speak of?
Also, no gas yet from my wife chili and all the beer I drank last night.
Francisco was full of FAIL in the fourth
The Suck-off award goes to the Steeler fan next to me who probably couldn’t find the city on a map who kept saying “That’s a touchdown” at the end of the half. NO SHIT
Thai food, my friend. It apparently gets you at both ends, heartburn and assburn.
And yeah, whoever thinks I give a shit about the heroic origin story of the fucking Budweiser Clydesdales is obviously an underling to the Drinkability douche.
Those fucking Clydesdales need to take a trip to the glue factory.
/Conan’s Bud Light commercial was the only decent one
No idea if it’s been mentioned, but what the fuck happened to Brenda Warner? She’s tap tap tapable now.
Seriously, Bud. Why does a 3rd generation Clydesdale have a Scottish accent? Your better than this.
As annoying as all the penalty flags were, there weren’t too many replays that I saw where I said, “Oh, that’s bullshit.” That last “fumble” by Warner needed to be reviewed, though. A Hail Mary — successful or not — would have been a much more satisfying end to the Super Bowl.
Seriously? The facemask on the sideline was questionable at best, the roughing the passer was horrific, and the roughing the holder was bs. Hes got a helmet and shoulder pads on, man up
Roughing the passer was paid for and NO CALL on the TD celebration at the end on Holmes. What about the automatic when you use the football as a prop.
Arizona fans now know how Seattle feels when the NFL picks the winner ahead of time. It is the real Rooney rule.
blah blah blah, cry about it cardinals fans. see you in another 60 or so years.
Hey Cardinal fans. You want cheese with your whine. If you folks showed half as much enthusiasm for your team by showing up at their games as you do crying in your “jumpin on the cards bandwagon” blogs, maybe the Lombardi trophy will stop in Phoenix. Pittsburgh is known as the NFL’s “City of Champions”, recently all Arizona has produced is the Cards and John McCain, HAHAHAHA! Nuf Said!
Comment on this post:
You must be logged in to post a comment. Not yet a member, register for free.