Arguably the greatest piece of child molestation memorabilia is going up for auction in April. Pop sensation Michael Jackson might be feeling the pinch of these trying economic times, as he’s announced that he’ll be selling off various crap from the molestation Mecca known as Neverland Ranch. From Press Association [emphasis added]:
Personal belongings, costumes, furniture and art are among the items going under the hammer at Los Angeles’ Beverly Hilton hotel in April.
A signed oil-painting of Jackson dressed as a king, valued between £2,800 and £4,200 is being offered for sale, alongside a golf cart featuring the singer depicted as Peter Pan, expected to fetch up to £4,200 [almost $6,000].
“Hey. Kid. Wanna head upstairs into my bed? I have candy in there. No? What if we take my golf cart? See, it has a picture of me dressed as Peter Pan. Sure, you can drive. If you take your pants off. Say, kid. You like The Beatles?”
![[image]](http://cdn.wl.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/05/wizard-battle-stadium-180x180.png)
![[image]](http://cdn.wl.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/05/Mind-of-Mencia-180x180.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.wl.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/05/miguel-angel-jimenez-180x180.png)
![[image]](http://cdn.wl.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/05/golf-putt-of-the-year1-180x180.png)
Did I accidentally click on TMZ?
The greatest piece of molestation memorabilia is the polaroid that I have of Upstate Underdog blowing Gary Glitter. Don’t ask me how I got it.
I don’t get it. Is Michael Jackson weird about kids or something?
I’d buy that golf cart, but apparently the only song that plays on the car stereo is the Concrete Blonde song “Tomorrow, Wendy.”
(Obscure, unfunny joke explained: “Tomorrow, Wendy” is a song about a girl who is dying of AIDS. Wendy is a character from Peter Pan.)
Punter, do you like gladiator movies?
@Zack: If there’s an unfunny AIDS joke, I haven’t heard it yet.
I wonder if they’ll find any Lost Boys at Peter Pan’s ranch. I don’t mean Corey Feldman. He can stay lost.
I SHOULD SING THE MICKEY MOUSE PEDO SONG THIS ONE GUY SANG TO ME WHEN I WAS A KID!
…
DOR SHO GHA!
@WDYA: One time my friend Todd had sex with a hooker at his bachelor party and the condom broke, and then he freaked out and got tested for AIDS and before the results came back we got another friend’s sister (who works as a receptionist at a doctor’s office) to give us some medical-looking forms and typed it up so it looked really official and said his HIV test was positive, and then sent it to his home address (he was living with his fiancee) under her name so she’d open it. According to Todd, that was a very unfunny AIDS joke.
/dramatization – may not have happened.
@Zack: Whether that happened or not, Todd’s incorrect. That’s a VERY funny AIDS joke.
Is Todd dead yet?
‘Cause then the jokes on you!
Nah, Todd’s just fine. He still thinks he has AIDS, though. You’d think he’d have figured out it’s a joke by now, because every time we get together someone will say “Hey Todd, how’s that AIDS thing going?” or “Hey Todd, if you’re thirsty we have two different kinds of lemon-AIDS” or “Hey Todd, do you want to carpool to that party up in the Valley so we can take the H-I-V lane?” and we’ll all snicker and then he’ll get really mad and rant about how that stupid hooker ruined his life. And then he’ll usually start crying.
Alright I know its hours after these posts were written but:
Zack: +1
/how did this not happen earlier?
I feel pity on him, I like his song very much before. But now his face was destroied completed!One of his neighbors posted a topic about him on the famous celebrity&wealthy dating site ^^^^^www celebmingle com^^^^^, she said he always cover his face when going out, and he is nearly a mad man and becoming more and more strange.