Philadelphia hosts the Wing Bowl every Friday before the Super Bowl, and the event — which didn’t allow professional competitive eaters to participate this year — featured the usual amount of gluttony and debauchery.

[A] man nicknamed Super Squibb has won Philadelphia’s Wing Bowl by downing 203 chicken wings in about 20 minutes.  For his efforts, 23-year-old John Squibb of Berlin, N.J., gets a car, a $7,500 diamond ring and a crown of miniature chickens.

That crown of miniature chickens is gonna come in handy.  Women are going to see it and assume that he’s royalty.  And all the guys will be jealous.  “There goes Squibb.  Look at him, walking around like he’s the King of Chickentown.”  “Uh, he is the King of Chickentown.  Got the crown and everything.”

The contest is sponsored by sports-talk station WIP-AM. It also features scantily clad “Wingettes” and a cast of sickened contestants.

Anyway, if you think this is just an excuse to link to the “18 dirtiest girls in Wing Bowl history” at Busted Coverage, congratulations.  You saw right through my sexy plan.