…and probably getting sodomized by someone a lot uglier than this. Not that I personally worry about that kind of thing. See, I have a conjoined twin and we’re connected four inches above my anus. If only everyone’s Hershey highway had its very own tollbooth operator. But anyway, the lesson here is that you shouldn’t drink and drive, unless you’re really, REALLY good at it.
Barkley just pled guilty to 2 counts of driving under the influence and pleaded “responsible” to running a stop sign for the December 31 incident in Scottsdale.
Barkley was sentenced to 10 days in jail — but will only do five if he completes an alcohol education program. Barkley was also fined $2,000.
Methinks going to jail in Scottsdale would be like going to a spa in Wichita, but there’s a chance that Barkley could end up in Arizona’s famous Tent City Jail, which was the greatest idea ever. Charles Barkley without air conditioning? Good luck pinning him down on laundry night.
UPDATE: TMZ is reporting that Barkley will in fact be headed to Tent City, and will be paired up with…DMX?!
[TMZ]
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![[image]](http://cdn.wl.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/05/Sad-James-Dolan-is-Sad-180x180.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.wl.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/05/wilt-chamberlain-cat-180x180.png)
![[image]](http://cdn.wl.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/05/macklemore-detlef-180x180.png)
Jail is not prison. Less shiving and more boredom.
@Punch: But still some sexy anal rape, right? RIGHT?
…and for some reason, your fellow inmates really enjoy CBS programming which may or may not be why they are in jail in the first place.
i wonder if he could tie in the t-bagging he’ll be getting somehow with the t-mobile commercials he’s doing?
he could add his new cell mate “meat helmet” to his fav 5
really CNN? in-’tents’? that’s the best you could do?
the good news is, going around the corner for a blow job has never been easier.
the bad news is… well shit, no bad news!
Well if it’s on TMZ you know it’s true.
Rookie. CB should know that celebs should only drink and drive in LA. He could have run over a bucket of puppies being carried by a troop of Girl Scouts and only gotten a big “No no!!” from the judge.
Sadly, I know what Tent City is like, firsthand. The chances of Barkley being anywhere DMX are pretty much slim to none. Tent City has two sets of tents, and the DUI tents are much more lenient than where DMX is staying. Sir Charles will most likely do 48 hours, get relased for 12, then come back on that kind of schedule until his time is up. If Charles comes back drunk after his 12 hour hiatus, only then will he get “rolled up” and sent to the tents where DMX currently reside, a whole different set of tentds with much stricter policies. Barkley will most likely get to wear his street clothes the whole time, whereas DMX is wearing the pink underwear, the striped jumpsuits, and pink flip flops. But then again, that’s what he gets for getting pitbulls high on meth and forcing them to make doggie porn, or wtf-ever he made them do.
The only thing Barkley *really* needs to worry about is all the illegal immigrants filled with tuberculosis that will be sleeping above or below him, and not returning drunk after his 12 hour ‘work release’.