SOCCER IS BAD FOR YOUR FACE
01.21.09The alternate headline for this video is 2Saves1Faceplant, as this heroic goalkeeper pulls off what may be the greatest feat every seen during a rec league penalty kick: a diving save, then a quick recovery to make a slide tackle save that leads to the striker’s face going directly into the post.
I don’t want to get sentimental or come off as too maudlin, but the fact that this happened naturally — and not in some retarded soccer movie like the one with Will Ferrell or the one with Rodney Dangerfield or the one that Bill Simmons always talks about — actually makes me believe that God exists. And He totally has the same sense of humor that I do. High-five, God! Hello? **puts hand back down** That’s cool. He’s probably pretty busy.
[Dirty Tackle]

Guess he’s gonna have to give sucking dick a rain check…
That fucking sucks they still scored. Where you at, fullbacks? Lazy motherfuckers.
Guess he’s gonna have to give sucking dick a rain check…
Getting a gummy feels much better. It’s also safer when you kick the hooker in her tits and she doesn’t bite down on your cock.
Could you imagine if that happened to Dwayne Wade? they would probably have to air lift him to a hospital for some ice
rv, or Paul Pierce. There’s a guy that I wouldn’t mind stabbing in the face.
The thing I love most about these clips is when they’re over, there are a half-dozen similar ones right there for me to click on.
I actually laughed harder at the air horn that someone blew just as he kicked. Something about an air horn gets me every time. I’m special, aren’t I?
/resumes eating paste