“There’s just gotta be more to life than swimming around and killing shit, y’know?” “Totally.” “I get so lonely sometimes.” “Let’s get out of here.”

A decade-long study involving thousands of scientists suggests that great white sharks meet at a specific spot between California and Hawaii in what marine biologists think may be an underwater singles bar.

The stretch of ocean the sharks make for – from both California and Mexico – is not a particularly rich feeding ground but it may act as a “singles bar” where they can find a mate.

“There is something going on there but as yet we don’t know,” said marine biologist Professor Ron O’Dor  [Hee hee! "Odor"! -- Ed.]. “Maybe it’s just a good place to pick up girl sharks.”

So, this story isn’t really about sports at all. But sharks hooking up in a bar should be sports-related. Besides, if you know of a better way to segue into video of penguins doing it, I’d like to know. And don’t tell me I should write about the Pittsburgh Penguins. The last thing I want is to attract any more hockey fans.