MIKE SINGLETARY’S JOB SUCKS
11.11.08
The Cardinals hadn’t won on Monday Night Football in two decades, and last night they tried to lose in the most heartbreaking fashion possible, but they didn’t count on the 49ers wanting it even less. Thanks to a Kurt Warner-orchestrated comeback and the Niners’ love of turning the ball over, the Cards won 29-24.
If you missed the game, don’t believe what the journalists are calling Arizona’s “last-second goal-line stand.” Here was the situation for the Niners: second and goal from the 1 after Shaun Hill spiked the ball to stop the clock following three straight completions picking apart Arizona’s D. Three chances for the end zone, no timeouts, twenty seconds on the clock. Noted offensive genius Mike Martz calls two RUNNING PLAYS, one to Frank Gore for the loss of a yard, the other a dive play up the middle with Michael Robinson. Stuffed. Game over.
After the jump, enjoy video Kurt Warner thanking God for Martz’s shitty play-calling, and Tim Hightower shattering the visor of Mark Roman. It was the one play where Hightower wasn’t a complete and utter waste of a player on the field.
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A HANDOFF to MICHAEL FUCKING ROBINSON. That was the worst play call I’ve ever seen.
Kurt Warner: I was just doin’ a lot of prayin’, and, you know, I’m just thankful God hates fags so much.
“God allowed us to win because of all the homosexuals in San Francisco, nasty!”
MIKE SINGLETARY’S JOB SUCKS
MIKE SINGLETARY’S JOB = FOOTBALL
Ipso facto, FOOTBALL SUCKS.
Add the combined late game suckage of Shaun Hill’s shovel pass, poor clock management near the goal line, the two idiotic run plays called by Martz, put those all together, and they still equal genius on par with Mozart’s Requiem compared to the unparalleled mindfucking stupidity of each and every word that came out of Kornheiser’s mouth last night.
Just once, I would like someone from the mainstream media call Martz out for his overall crappiness. He’s one of the most overrated members of the NFL I’ve ever seen.
I remember a few years back in a Rams-Panthers playoff game when he called an option on the goalline–with Marc Bulger.
@ Cock Flashy: +100….seriously, I dont think he even watches the games. He goes in with some prepared comments and storylines, and beats them into the ground no matter what. Just atrocious.
@HHY: Exactly. He rams his talking points down your throat no matter how irrelevant they are to the game. And when he DOES talk about the game, he’s a fucking idiot. After the Robinson run, TK was going on and on about how he couldn’t understand why they didn’t run Gore instead, ignoring the fact that Gore had just been helped off the field TWO MINUTES BEFORE.
Also atrocious last night: the officiating
Mr. Hightower, thanks for fucking my fantasy team over last night you Richmond Spider piece of shit!
The drummer from Def Leppard has a better arm than Shaun Hill.
The last three minutes of that game were maybe the worst three minutes in my life as a 49ers fan. It was like watching the last five years summed up in about 12 plays. I especially liked how it took the offense 20 seconds to figure out how to spike the ball.
Matt, I’d like to submit the Bay Area as a challenger to Seattle’s crown of Most Pathetic Sports Teams.
MIKE SINGLETARY SUCKS AT HIS JOB.
Kornheiser with 2:30 left in game – “This game is over.”
Kornheiser with :30 left in game – “Can I take back what I said 2 minutes ago?”
What an idiot. Might as well bring back Dennis Miller.
Teams do this all the time it piss me off. They were all celebrating that they got to the two yardline, oblivious to the fact that they still have to score. ESPN showed a shot of Martz celebrating and then the genius realized he need to call a play.
My Strategy, Quit being San Fran fags, and get to the line. Call the same pass play, and fake spike, if nothings open throw it away. Hey look 2nd down… Okay, guys we are going to do a running play here, but if we don’t get in here’s the next play…..but get in because if you don’t, Singletary will be forced to show us his ass again.