10.06.08 ALEX RODRIGUEZ IS SOMEWHAT WEALTHY
This photo has kind of been everywhere over the last day, but I want to weigh in because I’ve read a lot of negative things about A-Rod using a $100 bill to wipe his face, and I think people are being really unfair in their criticism of him.
Like, if he can’t wipe his face with a fresh, clean hundred-dollar bill, exactly what kind of bill should he use? A five? A one? Please. What use could he have for bills that small? A twenty? Pffffft. Twenties get touched by commoners’ hands every day. There’s no telling what kind of germs might be on those.
Now, a C-note — that makes sense. They come in nice packages of a hundred, and you can use them once and throw them away. It’s not an ostentatious display of wealth. Why, just earlier today A-Rod felt poor when he realized who couldn’t get a $400-million yacht like Roman Abramovich. This downturn in the market has been tough on all of us.
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There are 13 comments about:
ALEX RODRIGUEZ IS SOMEWHAT WEALTHY
That’s one way to get the Tom Brady juice off your face.
That’s totally fake. No one could possibly be that fucking orange.
That’s nothing. He wipes his ass with fresh midgets.
He lets Madonna’s kids take turns waxing his balls.
Alex, what are you doing???
NEVER show the money til he shows the goods!
(In this case, “the goods” refers to some sort of cock/balls combo.)
A-Rod: So, you bout ready to blow this joint and roll back to my place?
Brunette Girl: Actually I think I may just go home and finish up some laundry.
A-Rod: What? [pulls out stack of hundreds and wipes face with one]
Brunette Girl: Oh wait, you know what? I finished my last load of clothes last night. Let’s go Derrick.
A-Rod: Look here bitch, I’m… ah fuck it. [whistles for cab]
to be fair. the 100’s tend to be crisper and, thus, roll up into a much tighter, more efficient tube. just saying.
Does he have liverspots on his hands? Gross.
Why is everyone jumping to the conclusion that he is using the $100 bill to wipe something OFF his face? Isn’t it just as plausible that he’s using the $100 bill to wipe something ONTO his face, such as Tom Brady’s semen?
well, i knew he was a douche for calling Madonna his “soul mate” and this is further evidence.
Besides, he LOOKS like an effeminate prima donna.
@Zack: Tom Brady doesn’t have semen. He immaculately ejaculates full-grown offspring from his cock.
I love your frosted fucking tips!
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