FANTASY FOOTBALL IS STRESSFUL
09.30.08
A Florida man upset about points in a fantasy football league was arrested after he allegedly branded a knife and threatened to kill his roommate. What a shame. Fantasy football is only supposed to make you want to kill NFL players. (Seriously, T.J. Houshmandzadeh: put some points up this week or get stabbed.)
According to a report from the Charlotte County Sheriff’s Office, Chester Marcial “Chet” Ward, of the 4500 block of Duncan Road in Punta Gorda, allegedly sliced pages in the book his roommate was reading before holding a knife to his roommate’s neck and threatening to kill him…
The report stated Ward resisted arrest and even struck an officer’s hands before running across Duncan Road to escape arrest. As he ran away from the residence, Ward was Tasered by another deputy, and was then handcuffed.
I think we need to know the whole story here. Like, for example, did he lose because he benched Brett Favre? Because that would probably make it justified. People need to understand that fantasy football enthusiasts are dangerous. They’re like wounded wild animals. They’re in a lot of pain, and unless you’ve got extra tranq darts, the safest thing to do is get far, far away.

The groups that (i) read this blog, and (ii) would convict this guy, are mutually exclusive.
You know fantasy football season is in full swing when stabbings are involved.
Real progressive, Matt. A story about a knife-wielding idiot, so you photoshop a picture of a black guy. Nice.
T.J. Houshmandzadeh? What is that? Dutch-Irish? Sounds like the command Ali Baba and the Forty Thieves would use to enter the cave.
OJ has the same face I have every time I check the box scores on my fantasy teams this year.
@ WDYA – photoshop credit to tony homo.
too bad this assclown didn’t take out any WAFS members.
My league was a $100 buy in, so, yea, i can empathize.
Watch your back, JT O’Sullivan! *stink eye*
Guess now is not the time to tell him that standard scoring leagues with serpentine drafts are for sissies and require the fantasy skill of a retarded fifth grader.
If anything he should be going after those cocksuckers at KFFL
My hatred of Houshmandzadeh is matched only by my LOATHING of that cocksucker Ben Roethlisberger. Fuck you, Ben Roethlisberger!
A tasering is worth 3 pts in my IDP league.