You’d think that as a heavily tattooed boxer with a mohawk, cruiserweight Juan Carlos Robles would be maxed out on badass cred. Well, not quite. Robles wears a necklace… made from his own finger. THAT HE CUT OFF HIMSELF.
Following a 2007 motorcycle wreck that left him with a broken kneecap, fractured forearm, and dislocated elbow, Robles didn’t have the insurance coverage to amputate a pinkie finger that was mangled by road rash…
So he went home, put towels over the kitchen table and blocked off a working area with several two-by-fours. He put gauze around the area and twisted soldering wire around his right pinkie to slow the flow of blood.
“Then I put a wood chisel on it and dropped a 15-pound weight on the chisel,” Robles said. “The piece shot out about six feet like a missile.”
Well hold on just a second. Before you go thinking that’s the coolest thing you’ve ever heard, wait for me to tell my story. You see, one time I had a zit inside my nostril. I knew it was going to hurt, but a man’s gotta do what a man’s gotta do. Long story short, that’s a very sensitive area, and it’s natural for the body to react by producing tears.
[Deadspin]
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“Robles didn’t have the insurance coverage to amputate a pinkie finger that was mangled by road rash”
This may be the best argument ever AGAINST universal health coverage.
Ben Roethlisberger did the same thing with his hand after his motorcycle accident…
Or at least that’s what he should tell people after that shitty performance in last Sunday’s game.
I am not impressed. I wear an earring made from my own foreskin. That way I can tell the ladies “my penis just told me a secret. He likes you!”
@WWSM: Maybe it’s the amyls talking, but that’s the funniest shit I’ve read in minutes. Well played.
A-Rod grafted his dick into the back of his throat. Cut out the middle man I guess.
I’m not sure if we want more posts tagged with “That Story Gave Me A Boner” or not. I’m going with not.
This sounds like a Mexican version of The Big Lebowski.
I WONDER IF HE STILL FUCKING SAYS, “GIMME FIVE!”?
You know, they call them fingers, but…
He can still out-armwrestle a ninja turtle.
Then his girlfriend left him because she was craving the shocker and he just couldn’t deliver.
dude wears a necklace…. fag.
But can he still handle a leaf blower?
WWSM +eleventy
Hasn’t this dude ever seen “Sicko”? He could have just floated to Cuba and gotten taken care of. That’s the problem with our inner city school systems, they just don’t teach you how to exploit the systems of other countries like they used to.
Sidenote: I’m getting ads for finger splints on the right column. Way to shove it in his face guys.
There goes his future as a hot dog salesman.
Ufford…Here’s a link to a video of George Brett discussing in graphic detail about how he crapped his drawers…it should appeal to your USMC sensibilities:[mizzouboard.info]