…AND STAY OUT
09.24.08
Just days after Lions’ vice chairman Bill Ford publicly stated that bumbling oaf and team president/GM Matt Millen should be fired, Jay Glazer has reported that the reign of incompetence is finally over:
Millen was informed of the move last night during a late-night high-level meeting. This morning several people within the building confirmed that he had large packing boxes in his office and he made his way around to different employees telling them of the move.
It is unclear if Millen was fired or removed himself from the equation…
I like to think it was neither. The way I see it, an angry mob stood outside the complex with torches and pitchforks, and the Fords tossed Millen into the crowd in order to save themselves. Then the crowd was like, “Actually, we were just here to demand more environmentally friendly cars from the Ford Corporation.” But I’d like to think that they had the common sense to stab and burn him to death anyway.

I hope Millen was at least provided a golden parachute on his way out.
And by “golden parachute” I mean wrapped in a urine-stained bedsheet and dropped off the tallest building in town.
Quick! Get me Vegas! Put fifty on Detroit in 2010!
Next up, Dan Dierdorf!! Ex-NFL lineman with broadcasting experience is always the way to go when hiring someone to run your franchise!
I had an actual orgasm when I read about him being shit-canned this morning.
Or it may have been my habit of masturbating furiously as soon as I wake up in the morning…
“Mr. Millen? St Louis Rams on line 2….they would love to go 4-12.”
Dan Snyder can finally go after Millen.
Well if the bottom falls out, he can always play the father on “Webster”.
it probably took all this time because detroit was preparing for the inevitable riots when the news broke. and by “riots” i mean “wednesday morning.”
Finally, the Lions can be restored to their previous greatness of 6-10 seasons.
ognihs: And by “Wednesday morning” you mean “4 days away from the Raiders having their asses hands to them by the Chargers” right?
I think I speak for everyone when I say, “It’s time to bring back Wayne Fontes.”
This is like losing your virginity all over again. It took forever to do, but once you did, how good does it feel…….how good does it feel Detroit
@Enrico: Scott Mitchell can do his “hilarious” Fontes imitation again.
I just submitted my resume to the Lions organization. I hear there’s a job opening. Do you think that the Ford’s will hire me and then make the highest paid GM in the league like ‘ol Matt? I promise not to draft three WR’s in a row. First on the agenda – bring back “Cocaine Wayne”!
In Detroit the Fords are known for two things; firing Matt Millen and making some cars or some shit like that.
@ SteveGoesinYa
I think you immediately overqualified for displaying an ability to string together four complete sentences.
back in the day when Detroit made a deal with the devil to sell cars. they were told they would never win more than 7 games a year. so i dont see what the problem is, they still have 13 games to go…
The Sports Machine -
Maybe if I allow the Lions best player – Jason Hanson – to kick me in the head a few times, I’ll have the verbal skills of Matt Millen. Actually, my verbal skills would still be better than his. THEN, may I be President & CEO of the Lions?
Better yet, I just read in Forbes that the value of the Lions is $917 Million. Let’s get some money together and buy the team. Then, I’ll make myself GM and turn the team into a 12 game winner next year.