Every major sport has its own unique fan culture. And with each fan culture comes its own attendant drug culture. NASCAR fans typically gravitate towards using meth, 'ludes, Oxycontin and drinking Turtle Wax. Marijuana is just one of them elitist coastal drugs, so it's no wonder Tony Stewart displays a palpable unease with its terminology.

At one point, NASCAR Scene reporter Bob Pockrass asked Newman a multiple question regarding the length of his contract, when he signed it and if he'd have a part ownership in Stewart Haas Racing.

Stewart, who revels in jousting with the media, jumped in:

"What kind of crack are you on? You must be smoking pot grass."

Leaving aside the fact that pot grass sounds like an ingredient in a soup, let's look at the first part of that quote: What kind of crack is the media on? Answer: The best kind! How else could they gleefully spout so much stupid shit? It's just so much fun when you're high. Otherwise the job would just eat away at you until you're a joyless husk of a fat person. Yup, the media is all about access. To the best drugs.