Virgilijus Alekna, a two-time Olympic discus champion from Lithuania, tried to get in one last training session before he travels to Beijing and gets gunned down by storm troopers along with everybody else. The only problem: like the rest of Lithuania, the practice field was covered in dog shit.

"Dogs were doing what animals usually do, defecating and peeing," the professional bodyguard told Lithuanian daily Lietuvos zinios after the stadium he was using to train was used for a dog show on Sunday.

"There were lots of dogs and they have left lots of things behind … and nobody even tried to collect them.

"I have no idea how can I train in such conditions … and who would clean the discus after every throw."

Who would clean it? Probably some Estonian. Huh? Am I right, my Lithuanian brothers? Those people are so unclean. Now let us retire to my house for a dinner of goat shit over horse shit. Best part: guano bowls!