There's long been a "tastes great / less filling" sort of argument surrounding the beautiful subculture of rollerblading injury enthusiasts:  What's better, a face plant or a nut shot?  The pain of the groin injury is certainly unmatched, but the visual of a head snapping back (and the ensuing bleeding) can often be more rewarding.  "Face plant!"  "Nut shot!"  "FACE PLANT!"  "NUT SHOT!" — The battle rages on.

Well lemme tell ya something: here in America, we don't put harnesses on our dreams.  It doesn't have to be either/or.  You can have both.  Do you want a rollerblader to suffer a nut shot and then endure a face plant into the railing?  Baby, all you gotta do is ask.