
Javon Walker was beaten and robbed in Las Vegas early Monday morning. Soon after, he told his side of the story, during which he claimed to have been attacked in his room at the Bellagio. Now, in a shocking twist predicted by everyone, the Bellagio has confirmed what everyone but The Dirty already knew: Javon Walker's story was probably bullshit. A rep from the hotel:
The facts that have been reported regarding the incident involving Javon Walker are incorrect. I am unable to provide further detail out of respect for the Metro investigation which is currently underway.
Hmmm… who to believe? The pro athlete, or the people with 2000 surveillance cameras located inside and outside their hotel and casino? I may have to think about this one for a picosecond or two.
BONUS RUMOR! "As the rumor/speculation goes, a couple of guys saw Walker spraying Dom Perignon on Saturday night, and then recruited a woman to cozy up to him on Sunday night, and to get him to take her home, or wherever. Once outside, the robbers intervened, knocked Walker out, and took his watch and money." Wow, that sounds way more believable than a feud with Floyd Mayweather. But you have to admit, the Mayweather rumor is way more interesting. Just between you and me, I heard it was skinhead Scientologists. Their alien God demands they collect more bling!


First, the run-up to the Iraq War, now this. Shit, if it wasn’t for R. Kelly’s innocence, I wouldn’t have anything left to believe in.
Breaking newsflash:
M. Knight Shamaylan has confessed to the robbery. When asked for interview, Shamaylan exclaimed, "This was one of my most well hatched out ideas in years, I can't understand why it failed. Possibly the ending story I supplied Javon with was not believable? But I'm M. Knight…… How is that even possible?"
The robbers must have instilled some fear in him in order for Walker to lie to protect them.
This is an important lesson for anyone interested in kidnapping hookers. Always instill fear.
Jayson Williams now claims to have left his shotgun in Walker's hotel room 8 years ago. Details are murky.
Terry Benedict is sooooo gonna fuck up Walker for this.
/Lame Oceans Eleven Reference
gotta protect his street cred dawg
I thought about longer than a picosecond (1E-12), I actually thought about it for a nanosecond (1E-9)
/scientifically notated
//nerd
mmmmmm pico
Raiders never lie.
never=always
Never trust an ex-Donkey.
LETS GO WHITE SOX!
/sorry, I'm pumped for Sox-Cubs
//yes, I know only Swany and I care
Goonies never say die.
Go Chicago Baseball teams! One of them win today!
Not that I believed his story to begin with, but they better release any proof they have access to. Now! Please?