WAYNE ROONEY GOT MARRIED — In the biggest WAG event of the summer, the English wunderkind married his longtime girlfriend Colleen McLoughlin.  Colleen looks nice, but Wayne, well… let's go to Kickette: "Wayne still looks like a chav.  Even in a designer suit with soft focus lighting and the backdrop of the Italian Riviera.  God bless you, Wayne Rooney and your heritage that is strong enough to fend off the richest of riches and the frothiest of froth. Your blood is filled with pie and mash and the gravy of a thousand proud shin kickers before ye."  Yeah, what she said.

JOHN TERRY'S WIFE IS ATTRACTIVE — Toni Terry (nee Poole) recreated the original Wonderbra ad because, uh, why not.  Boobs, people.  Oh, and also to fight cancer.  Kind of a "breasts against breast cancer" sort of thing.

THE GERRARDS ARE STILL IN MIAMI –  More Alex Curran-Gerrard in a bikini.  Nothing ground-breaking, but this is always fun.