05.13.08 ZITO RISES TO MEDIOCRITY FOR ONE NIGHT
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With the NHL and NBA in the thick of their playoffs and several thousand more baseball games to play during the long, slow summer, MLB doesn't get much attention around here unless a player gets beaten with a helmet or a bat. But Giants pitcher Barry Zito is that rare player who can suck so spectacularly with such a staggeringly rich contract that he can actually steal headlines from more exciting sports — simply by being awful.
Zito, whose 30th birthday is today, is 0-7 with a 6.58 ERA, and it's gotten to the point that he's heralded for notching no-decisions, as he did with six innings of seven-hit, three-run ball last night (the Giants still lost).
For Barry Zito, a no-decision became a positive thing—a sign of progress… Zito pitched scoreless ball into the fourth inning for the first time all season, and his signature curveball was effective once again in matching his longest outing of the year at six innings. He received a standing ovation— perhaps slightly sarcastic—after a 1-2-3 first inning in which he needed only 11 pitches.
Last year, I hated the Mariners for trotting out washed-up bag of shit Jeff Weaver to the mound every fifth day. The one good thing was that Weaver made $8 million off of a one-year contract. Zito's getting paid $126 million over seven years. Only five and a half more years to go, San Francisco. Savor this while it lasts.
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There are 21 comments about:
ZITO RISES TO MEDIOCRITY FOR ONE NIGHT
He went from shitty to suck.
I can't pitch, I have a hand cramp from doing too much "Tune in Tokyo."
Somebody asked him how old he is…
You know they call um fingers, but I've never seen um fing. Oh wait, there they go.
Awesome! Now Giants fans have another reason to come to the ballpark in addition to seeing Rich Aurilia, Jose Castillo and Bengie Molina!
Hows this for Irony: I used to bet on Zito in the AL and now bet against him in the NL.
Rajai Davis would like to have a word with you BFiB….
Who?
Exactly.
if thats how he grips a baseball no wonder he is shit.
/relieved Met fan
He was describing his latest trip to the gentleman's club.
Look over his left shoulder, is he promoting the "Tit Farm". I would be interested in hearing his sales pitch.
Suck though he may, any "pitcher" with jazz hands will always have a place in SF.
Barry Zito makes Jason Giambi's contract look like a steal.
@ Hugh B.
Those aren't Jazz Hands, they are "spirit fingers"
Gosh, didn't you see Bring It On.
"and his signature curveball was effective once again"
yea, the one that curves right out of the ballpark off the other teams bat. its a thing-a-beauty.
Loving the long-sleeved collared button-down shirt under the jersey look.
"this is how I grip the ass before going in for the salad tossing"
Is that picture from 1997? Because I took a bunch of acid from a batch in 1997 that made me look at my hands in the same freaked out way.
Goddamnit.
I have the same birthday as Barry Zito.
This ruins everything.
couldnt care less about zito, but if i see weaver on the streets, i swear to god i will tell him how displeased i was with his performance in a non-violent way.
Just think how I felt when Joe Torre's mummified corpse stopped drinking green tea long enough to trot Weaver out for the 12th inning of Game 4 vs the Marlins in 03.
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